Wow, these are long days

Dear Family and Friends,
10:42 and time to go to bed. No naps today, not stops to catch the breath, just go go go. Ken and I walked this morning, then I worked for a while and made steel cut oats, then I set about making a loaf of bread. When I finally sat down at my desk I discovered I had a 11 am appointment in Livermore so I jammed out an appraisal that was needed and printed it out so I could deliver it when I was in Livermore. After the appraisal in Livermore and the delivery I located a new Subway and had lunch. Then back to the office for to write another appraisal which I did get done before a 5 pm appointment to see a relo in Brentwood. A relo is when a company, in this case Dow chemical, has decided to move someone across the country. part of the moving package is an agreement to purchase their existing home if it does not sell. The question of what to pay for the home is solved by two appraisals and at least one broker opinion. In these times preparing these appraisals is a huge challenge and I've not always been brutal enough with the values, its hard to anticipate just how bad it is going to be over the next 6 months when doing one of these. I'm graded on a quarterly report card based on the value I came in at vs the actual list price and then the actual sales price. If you are too low on the report card then you don't work for awhile.
This evening on my way home from the next appraisal after the relo I happened to find myself on the Brentwood Bypass and discovered that a new section, the final section of road was opened today, what a pleasure to bypass all those stop signs and turns in the road and use this new smooth highway. How Nan would have loved it, we always talked about how nice it would be when it opened and finally today it is open. Progress! What it means for me is a 1 hour trip to Concord or Walnut Creek can now be done in about 45 minutes if traffic is moving on Highway 4. That is a real improvement, a blessing.
Ken says we walk at 6:30 in the morning so I'll keep this short as I never seem to catch up on sleeping.
Tonight Art and Connie have arrived safely in Hawaii and are on vacation for a week. Art called to say the last time he was on Maui it was with Nan and me and that certainly took me back to a happy time. We had a blast on that trip, another whole set of great memories. Its hard to not be a bit bitter over knowing there will be no more fun trips with the worlds greatest traveling partner.
Got to see my girls this evening for a quick stop, Keanna was doing a magician act making things disappear, what a kid!
Well I'm going to say good night and God bless you where ever you are. Nice to see the stock market up today in spite of the fools in Washington and their inept handling of things. I'm glad we do not find our ultimate happiness in things but in people and God's blessings that really matter.

love to all

Tim

A very long day, home safely

Dear Family and Friends,
After about 5 hours or more of driving I'm back home again. I walked this morning, then showered, had oatmeal and grabbed the brief case and drove off. The GPS is always a bit long on its time estimations but the miles were about right, 166 miles to Oakhurst and the home I was to see. I loaded a new book on tape from CostCo and enjoyed the trip down. The fuel gauge hardly moved as I drove and even now after coming home with 385 miles it is just below the half mark. That will help as it only holds 13 gallons.
The homeowner was a delightful lady with an interesting story. Her first husband was a test pilot for Lockheed and was killed in a plane crash. She was a flight attendant for TWA and flew a lot with her husband too. One day she had a severe cold and in the process of ascending her ear drum ruptured leaving her with little hearing. So she told me when I arrived that she would be reading my lips and she did perfectly. The home was perfect, out in the country on 1/2 an acre and I enjoyed measuring and inspecting it. She told me of a good place to eat so I stopped there next. They had a great vegetarian sandwich on some strange wholesome bread, it was great. Then the next stop was at the Board of Realtors where I was allowed to use the boardroom and check out the sales in a book they provided. I've not done that for years. Then I loaded the addresses for 7 properties in the GPS and set out to locate them. All were on country roads and were every direction but after a couple hours I had them all except one and I never could find that property. As I completed the photographing of comparable sales it started to rain, that was downright fun to breath in the fresh air filled with the fragrance of rain. But as I started to descend to Madera the rain stopped and the hot air of the valley forced the AC to come back on for the rest of the trip. I was so happy to pull into my own driveway this evening, thankful for a safe trip, for the car holding together for one for day and for the chance to work.
New orders were waiting including a rush relo order which I have set for tomorrow afternoon at 4 pm. Its local which will be nice.
My job has its perks, as I rounded a corner today two deer were in the road. They were in no hurry to move along and I studied them up close, beautiful animals. So in one day I get to listen to a good book, meet someone with an interesting history, spend time in the mountains, see nature, have a nice lunch and have business and family phone calls through the bluetooth stuck in my ear. Not a bad day at all.
So I wish you all a good night!

love

tim

Keanna hits the slides....

Dear Family and Friends,
What a great family day this has turned out to be. Ken and I walked this morning and then I settled in to work for a while. At 10:30 I picked up Keanna and we drove to Lodi SDA Academy campus where a pet and hobby show was in full swing. Pam met us there and purchased tickets which were required for food, events, booths and play opportunities. Keanna had a blast, went fishing for toys, slid down a huge slide that scared me. The vegeburgers were great and we had a chance to see Donna Want, Shawn and Cindy and the kids. Fun stuff. Then with an eye on the clock I decided we needed to head toward home. Nikki met us at Spaghetti Factory where we enjoyed some more social time. Then we all went our own ways, Keanna, Kallie and Nikki headed home, Pam headed to the school where she is principal and I headed home to face two must finish appraisals. One is now emailed to Chevy Chase and I'm in the middle of the other one right now. I have XM radio classical channel playing through the computer, the AC is quietly blowing cooling air to keep the room and equipment at a decent temperature, the dogs are sleeping at my feet and I'm cranking.
Tomorrow morning I leave for a long trip to Oakhurst, gateway to Yosemite National Park. I'm seeing a little house there for my friend Bob Johnson who gives me work from time to time. Then back to check out a house in Modesto which has been described in some pretty unflattering terms, like falling down etc. We'll see. Then back home to unload all those checks in the mail box (wishful thinking). I won't have kido duty this week as Keanna is on a two week break from school and father Steve is caring for her tomorrow and Tuesday. She is looking forward to seeing her dad again.
The entire trip today was spent in spelling and sounding out words. She is amazing in how quickly she learns so its great fun for me to play along and encourage her.
I look forward to another positive week. It seems financial challenges will be with me for some time yet I'm still here and gaining on the bills a bit at a atime.
How is your week looking for you?
Well its time for me to go back to work, I'd rather talk with you than work any day but commitments are there to keep with clients.

Sending love to all,

Tim

They don't give groceries away.

Dear Family and Friends,
Well I'm just back from my neighborhood Safeway and I think I've been robbed! The one real positive benefit is that since I spent over $50 I get the .10 off at the gas pump on each precious gallon of fuel. Wow, I feel so much better now.
When I woke at 7 this morning the house was silent so I showered and then came down. Keanna was quietly playing in the family room having given me the courtesy of letting me sleep in. She suggested waffles so we made some, they turned out pretty well in spite of the missing egg from the batter. Remember no grocery shopping lately so supplies are used up. We got ready and drove the 24 miles to Sabbath School at the Tracy SDA church. Keanna was really on her best behavior and helped the other children participate. Kim did a great job as usual and I think every one enjoyed the experience. Then Keanna suggested she would like to play a bit at Burger King. They have an indoor play area with slides, tubes and in general a safe place to play. When considering how quickly these young years pass and a simple stop to play will be long forgotten I think this is worthwhile. She played for about 30 minutes and then we drove home and she returned to the loving care of her parents. I rested a bit, well more than a bit and this evening did my shopping thing along with making a larger deposit than usual at the bank. Good thing since by Tuesday I need to make the house payment. I think it will happen and I'm very thankful for lots of work in September. In a larger context I am delighted to see so many young families be able to purchase a home, many for the first time. I'm now seeing several home purchases a week and almost all are using a form of FHA financing. Since both Steve and I are FHA approved we are positioned well to be able to be of service to our clients and new clients as well. While all this dire hue and cry comes from Washington I see no evidence of disaster on the local level. It is true that lenders are being much more careful in how they lend and they are actually checking the backgrounds of people to see if they can qualify for the loans they are about to get, something that should have been happening over the past years. The majority of the mess in the industry comes from the fact that lenders were being forced to make loans to people who could not qualify and should not have been given loans at all. Had buyers been forced to even put 10% down when seeking a loan over the past 5 years the industry would not be in this mess. Congress decided that just about everyone should have a home and forced lenders to lower their standards and requirements to a laughable level. No proof of income, no proof of ability to pay payments, just show up and sign for the loan. And now this horrible experiment in social engineering is playing out and the wrong people are being bashed. To think that the same people who kept badgering Freddie and Fannie to loan to weaker and weaker clients are now writing the bailout is terribly wrong. They should be in jail but washington is corrupt and is only getting worse. We are in for some very scary times ahead I fear, however I don't fear too much. God is never surprised by what is happening here on earth, He never sleeps and for the most part He does no interfere or force His will. Whatever the future it is in His capable hands and eternity is safe and does not need a bail out from any human being, thank goodness.
It is a very refreshing time to care for Keanna. She has entered the letters and spelling, reading world, a very exciting time. She spells out letters constantly and then wants to know what they say, I find it pretty amazing and exciting. I can remember when both Nikki and Jason did the same thing, can you remember when your child started to read, to take these huge steps, pretty exciting stuff, of course it can drive a parent crazy, the constant questions. There are days when you sort of wish your child was just dull and quiet, then you could get work done but then you come to your senses and realize that dull would not be exciting or challenging.
Tomorrow I'm taking Keanna to Lodi Academy where we are meeting Pam and attending some event where animals, booths and lots of fun takes place. Shawn's kids are involved and we are supporting their endeavours. In addition to taking in this fun event I absolutely must general several reports tomorrow. Some were promised last week and have to be done tomorrow by the time I head to bed. Its time to settle down and generate some fine reports!

Tonight I'm sending out my little darts of love, encouraging you to make special efforts to let those who love you know you love them back. You've got to do this, I can't let Nan know anymore, she is resting now, so for our sake make the special effort, go to breakfast or trim the roses or do something to help off the honey do list. You have the chance to express love, do it now.

love

tim

Finally its Friday

The one bright spot in a long week is sleeping upstairs, Keanna is here tonight for a sleep over. She played quietly this evening, at a big dinner and went to bed without complaining. She comes up with the most amazing things, comments. Like where she asks me if she reminds me of Grammy, and of course I say yes because she does in so many ways. Or her voiced greeting to grammy as we drive by the cemetery, hello from kallie, Keanna, Mommy and Daddy and Grampy. So precious. Now she is very interested in sounding out words, using letters, wondering what letters she sees mean. She is more and more fun to work with. And her coloring just keeps getting better, her use of colors exciting.
This has been a week of struggles, of meeting challenges, like how to see properties, get them written up in a timely fashion, keeping an eye on new orders, running comp checks, managing money, keeping things paid. The fun has been time spent with the kids in the mornings and at other times of the day. They are full of life, ideas, smiles and energy. I feel I am so blessed to have little ones around and this week I've had a chance to see them all including Timothy at Jason's party on Monday night.
In a couple weeks time I've gone from having almost no work to having as much as I can handle. I've not had a chance to go grocery shopping or even buy paper that I need for the office.
Finally the Sabbath has arrived and gradually the stresses of the week are melting away.
In the morning Keanna has requested waffles and then we head to Sabbath School. It will be nice to breath a bit.
I realized this evening once again the reality of losing Nan. Alone without my buddy, my energizer bunny who always had ideas, fun ones that made life more than livable, she made it fun. I really miss her and the zest she brought to our lives.
Special thanks to special friends, Sylvia, Art, Sharon, Pam, Irene, Loree, Jerry and the kids who check in often and make sure I'm OK.

So good night my friends, my family

love

tim

A fast pace - Loree attacks the files and wins!

Dear Family and Friends,
I wish you could have seen it, Loree with her arms flying, pitching old files in the trash, throwing boxes around like they were toothpicks, moving files in and out of the file cabinets. Wow. Loree not only came back to help out but really did a job on the whole garage storage area. And she won't let anything slip by that's not right and in the right place. What a great help she is.

My day has been filled with scheduling, researching, working the phones, sometimes two lines at the same time, putting out appraisal fires and trying to rediscover my old work ethic, something that has been forgotten over the past few months. It is so thrilling to see the fax churning out orders or read emails and find new work there too. Now if I could just concentrate and produce like the old days. I don't want to blow the confidence brokers are putting in me to get their work done quickly and correctly. Something did not work out today. This is typical of what I face. I have an order from a new client, the first one, they think the value is $700K, an appointment is made for 2:30 this afternoon and in the morning I begin to do the research. As I work I discover that the highest sale in the entire little town is $480K, no where even close to the $700K so I start calling to let them know of the problem and after several calls back and forth it gets put on hold for a bit. Time spent was over an hour with NO income generated at all. Multiply that by several times a day and it is easy to see why the orders already seen sit waiting to be written while busy work takes up the time. If there was ever a time to rediscover discipline it is now.

This morning I rolled out, punched the alarm and was so tempted to fall back into the sleep by number bed but knowing I needed to walk I stayed up, walked my 3 miles, showered and then ran over to drive the girls to their morning appointments, I was intrigued as I watched Steve brush Keanna's hair and put it into the tie, he did such a good job and watching him I learned.

I worked in trying to get something completed and finally did just that as the day progressed. I found a quick lunch in a slice from a can of vege meat warmed and placed over whole wheat buns lightly toasted. That along with a bottle of water with a little bit of Crystal Lite for taste and I was ready for the afternoon shift. At 5:15 I picked up Keanna for tumbling class in Brentwood so Nikki could attend a special class offered by Keanna's teacher at the school. Then I drove her home and went to grief group. Tonight's session was not so good, someone new was there and did a lot of talking, more than was helpful to others, perhaps it will be better next time. Cancer brings out strange things and we all express grief and fears differently.

Now its too late once again for bed, will I ever learn? I've enjoyed some very cute things, emails today from Carol, Barbara, Sylvia and others, how did we ever get by without the Internet? Could that have been why I used to get more done? Before the Internet? Mmmm, something to consider.

For now I'm wishing each of you a peaceful night, love to all

Tim

A day with challenges

Dear Family and Friends,
I'm really glad this day is drawing to a close. It started fine with getting the girls to to school and sitter, then back to work in the office. Several reports came together and were emailed to their lenders but there was also some pretty negative events. Jean had warned me on a purchase appraisal here in the new end of Discovery Bay, warned me that the sketch was coming up very short of the living area reported in the public record for the home. So for warned I set out to tweak the cad rendering of the sketch. Nothing seemed to be wrong with the dimensions so finally in desperation I drove back to the house and measured it again. This time I poured over the sketch and the dimensions but nothing changed. The measurements I had found the first time were basically correct. The implications are huge. Over the past years buyers have sued sellers over even 50 sf difference and I have measured the house to be nearly 400 sf smaller than that reported in public record. So I have informed the lender who in this case is my client and she will in turn inform the buyer who may or may not be upset to learn she is buying a house about 400 sf smaller than what she thought. That was just one of many challenges the day brought and I'm not sad to be saying good bye to this day.

This evening brought a ray of sunlight, Nikki called and suggested we have some dinner. The idea sounded good and I needed to take two more photos of a house in Antioch anyway so we had a burrito with whole beans and wonderful rice and then they headed home and I drove on to Antioch. The sun sets earlier these days but I believe the photos will turn out well. While I was there I went on to CostCo for mocha, a couple books to listen to when I drive, bananas and yogurt berry sundae. Yum. That's about as close as I get to drowning my sorrows.

Now I'm back and I discovered Ken cannot walk in the morning, early morning meeting so I'll walk on my own. Keeping positive is easier some days than others. For lunch I made a griller and needing a drink I grabbed a Mountain Dew. I've never had one before and I don't plan to have another. Things seemed to go downhill after that drink, am I crazy? probably.

Jean has been a real help to me with the writing process of appraisals. There are some I have to write myself for different reasons but often times Jean can take the data contained in the file along with my inspection notes and render a pretty good appraisal. She loves to do research and does a great job of writing. Unfortunately Jean is being called away on a mission trip, yea that right a mission trip, her mission is to totally relax and enjoy Hawaii for a week, next week. My heart just bleeds for her to have to put up with warm breezes, warm ocean water, white sand beaches and all those huge tropical flowers, poor dear!

Well enough, time to hit the hay, strap on the mask and just fall into deep slumber. I can't wait!

Good night my friends and family,

love to all,

Tim

Busy and loving it.......

Dear Friends and Family,
Another whirlwind day, up at 5:30, showered and worked until 6:20, time to drive to the kids house at the other end of Discovery Bay, fixed breakfast for Keanna, scooped up Kallie who was grinning from ear to ear, ready for the day, drove to school, delivered Keanna to the gate, drove to the sitters and shifted Kallie to their excellent care, then back home to switch cars and leave with a granola bar for breakfast, pick up check at residence in Brentwood, arrive in Antioch for inspection of little lake front home, then drive to Oakland for inspection of two story home with two units and pit bulls everywhere, Marilyn would have loved it as she has two human eating pit bulls that roam her home, she thinks they are pussy cats!. Then at 1 pm headed for Discovery Bay, drove very fast so I would not be late to pick up Keanna, was there for her, then home to work. Keanna was a very helpful girl, she colored and snacked on Cheerios and rice milk, I worked. At 4:45 I emailed out an appraisal that was promised today, whew! Then Nikki picked up Keanna and I left for a driveby appraisal in Livermore, picked up yet another check and got to see a brand new motorcycle dealership for BMW and other makes. The person hiring me was the owner and she was very excited about her new business. It was beautiful, hundreds of bikes on display, they scare me but I did drool a bit. Then I drove to the driveby using the GPS. The new download software sure is nice, much more clear, has more streets and I now wonder why I waited to download it for so long. After I finished the appraisal I realized I was really hungry so I asked the GPS for a Applebees and I enjoyed a nice dinner. Then it was just a short 20 minute drive home via a fuel stop for some $3.83 diesel!
The dogs were very glad to see me when I arrived home, the fish tank needed water and my desk was deep in files, the fax machine was covered in pages of a contract for a new purchase, it was downright exciting.
I'm thankful for the upturn in orders. I've been able to cover many extra's that I never thought I would be able to pay so far this month and it feels pretty good. Oh yes I have a long ways to go yet to really see the light but at least I'm heading in the right direction now.
Once again I reflect that I have an awful lot to be thankful for. This morning Sylvia forwarded an email to me with pictures and words for an Irish Blessing. It was just wonderful and such a great way to start at 5:45 in the morning.
Good night to all and be blessed.

love

tim

Jason turns 31

Dear Family and Friends,

I've just returned from a happy evening celebrating Jason's 31st birthday. Timothy was enjoying his new freedom as a walking dude now. On the last part of the trip to Jason and Jo'

s house the traffic slowed and then stopped. I was on Highway 1 and learned that a semi had burned, finally I moved forward enough to see the wreckage, hasmat teams were all over removing the mess from the northbound side but the looki lus on my side were holding up traffic. What a mess. So I came home the way Nan and I discovered, Highway 129 across to 101 and then home that way. I was beginning to get tired. As I drove home the car began to fail and I limped home. I believe something is happening to the turbo as the power that I'm used to just is not there now especially on hills. I'll start with some fuel cleaner I have, then have the filter replaced and then get serious if those two things do not solve the problem. I really was hoping not to have to spend any more money on car repairs for awhile, not now with so many extras going out at the moment.

I have to report that after months of little work now I'm swamped. Orders just keep coming in and I'm hopping to try to keep up with the rush. Tomorrow morning I have to drive to Antioch and then to Oakland before returning to pick Keanna up at 2 pm from school. While its wonderful to have so much work getting it all done is proving to be a real challenge. Jean has been helping, she is the writer and trained appraiser I depend on so much. She is a huge help. Let me tell you, there are not a lot of extra wasted moments these days.

This morning I was stood up at my first appointment. The potential buyer had cancelled last Friday but the loan company did not get the word to me so a rushed trip to Antioch and on time arrival was wasted. Fortunately I happened to have two more orders that were fully researched and read to go with me. Each had a combo lockbox access and were empty. The first was a real sad experience. The owners lost the home and did not go gracefully. As they left they left trash, ripped off crown molding, light fixtures, kitchen cabinets and appliances and too these items with them. This was a beautiful 3800 SF home is a nearly new neighborhood and will nice again when the buyers do their magic. The second home was just the opposite. The people lost the home but left everything in perfect condition and order. It was an act of class and the home is perfect for the buyers, a home that was worth $600+ is now selling for $389,000. What a deal and I see this picture over and over these days.

Then I rushed back to pick up a new file, run to the golf course to take two more photos and then back to the school to await Miss Keanna's release. We came home, found some Cheerios and headed for the park where she played and played. Then back home to hook up with Nikki and I left for MBA, a two hour trip. I arrived at 7, presented Jason with a card and little gift and then at 8:20 left to return home. Now I'm ready to crash and feel satisfied that this has been a day well lived.

Good night friends and family,

love to all

tim

A quiet day of production & a call from Irene

Dear Family and Friends,
Walked this morning with Ken, then showered, had breakfast, then to work. While I worked at the computer the clothes washer worked on three loads of wash, one to go yet this evening. Now the shirts are hanging up pretty much wrinkle free and loads of clean clothes are ready for their trip upstairs. After writing on appraisal this morning I ventured out to see a local sale, shot the comps, came home and finished the appraisal, you see I had to since it was for LeAnn next door and it would not be safe if I didn't finish this report, LeAnn is not someone you let twist in the wind, Ken says she is a force to be reckoned with and after their many years together I think he knows of what he speaks. LeAnn sure did her part, picked up a check for the fee, supplied all the information that I needed and kept me informed of when I could see the property.
Tomorrow morning I have the high privilege of caring for my precious girls, Kallie and Keanna and get them safely to school and the sitters, then drive directly to Antioch to meet with a buyer and pick up a check, then see two other sales, one in Brentwood and the other in Discovery Bay, then back to pick up Keanna at 2 from school. We will probably head to the park tomorrow for awhile if she is feeling up to it.
Do you ever wrestle with knowing exactly what you should be doing but end up over and over again doing something else? Take lunch today. The local pizza place here in Discovery Bay serves a nice personal pizza and has a pretty good salad bar so I went there for lunch. I know from experience that a full salad and ONE slice of pizza will fill me up and the rest goes into a box to come home. But I brought one slice home and ate the rest. That kind of behavior does not get me where I want to be at all. There was a time when we still lived in Tracy that Larry Seyfang and I started to run together. He urged me to get going and I did. Eventually I lost many pounds and learned to stop with one piece of pizza or a limited amount of anything else I happened to be eating. It was great discipline but I seem to have lost something as the years passed, well actually I did not lose really, I gained, about 75 lbs over the past 20 years. Its like carrying a sack of cement with me everywhere I go. Somehow I need to find a new path.
This afternoon Irene called. She was able to bring me up to date on what she has been having to cope with. Her GIST has returned and has caused her a great deal of pain. Recently she embarked on a dual response to the tumor growth. In spite of the lack of a clear mandate from GIST experts that radiation on the tumors might help she decided to proceed. She had 10 sessions and at the same time started a new targeted drug known as Nexavar. This week she has been very tired and after even one hour in the morning her strength was pretty much sapped. Yet she has felt better the last two days for which we are both grateful. Irene is a calm woman of faith and has great courage. No one call tell if the radiation has helped but her pain level is much much lower now which might suggest that there was benefit. I know Nan experienced almost immediate relief from the tumor that was radiated again in spite of any proof ahead of time that GIST tumors might respond to the treatment. Irene will always appreciate our remembering her in prayer. She reminded me that very soon there will be a GIST walk in San Jose to raise awareness and funds for GIST research. I believe she said it was October 26th and I intend to be there and do the walk. I'll soon be able to point you to a web site with information about the walk.
So we all move into a new week. What excitement will it hold? What lessons are there to be learned this week? How might God use us to help others?
I want to thank you for reading these words and I hope that your week will be positive in your walk through life.
love

tim
ps Tomorrow evening is a party for Jason at his house. I'm going to try to attend, exactly how to get there and back home is still not clear but we will see. Happy Birthday son!

Sabbath

Good evening,
On June 7, 2006 we were finally back in the room at a hotel in Boston. There were many of us there and as some tried to sleep, Jason sat at the desk in the near darkness poised over the laptop setting up the blog. I had never even heard of a blog much less written one but Jason felt it would be the best way to keep loving family and friends informed about Nan's precarious condition without each having to call one of the cell phones. What a favor he did his mom and all of us that night as he worked. Finally he called me over and showed me the basics of what I was to do for the next 2 and 1/2 years, write the "blog". Since that time I have blogged in some unusual places, hallways, waiting rooms at all times of the night, hospital rooms huddled in a corner with no light so Nan could rest, sometimes in the car outside emergency rooms, sometimes in airports and once even over the phone from a hospital room in Mexico as I dictated what I wanted to share and Art created the blog from Gilroy. I have now written nearly 900 messages some filled with hope, some with terrible news and even the one that was hardest to write letting you know Nan had fallen asleep in Jesus. You my friend and family member have responded in amazing ways, you have shared our family burden with prayers day and night, cards, care packages, donations of money, flights and loving gestures. Often I hear of people going through tough times and they seem to be surrounded by idiots, the terrible advice and comments they have to endure. Our family feels just the opposite. We have experienced only love, care, support and the best one could hope for. As long as I live I will do my best to respond to others in need, thats the way I and the family have been treated. And a special word about Nan's family. The support, daily phone calls, gestures of love from this family are amazing and I found that warmth when I recently visited the family in Eastland. These are real people who really know how to care.
A special thanks to Jason who helped set up the blog so long ago. It has made a great difference in my life.
Becky Lanza delivered a fine sermon today at the Tracy church re: Live is Difficult. Well as a matter of fact yes it is but also very doable and enjoyable and challenging as well. Then I called Nikki and got Keanna on the phone. There were nearby and we met at the good old Olive Garden, it never disappoints. Kallie was wanting more food than was available and it was a pleasure to be able to take her out of Nikki's care and just walk around a bit, she quieted down as we walked. Because I've been with her and Keanna so much I feel more confident to care for her, that way Nikki could finish her food and a better time was had by all. Then they went their way and I went my way, home for a nap. Then up to quickly get some much needed meds at longs before they closed for the night, then as I was driving home I realized that the Olive Garden lunch was wearing off so I went to Boardwalk, a local place by the water here in Discovery Bay where the Gardenburgers are perfect. I watched boats come and go while I ate and enjoyed the quiet moments very much. Then home to tackle a few tasks, dump the trash out of the bug, someone had dropped mocha bottles, taco bell wrappers, straws, drink cubs on the FLOOR of the car, can you believe that! the mess was getting deep. Then the GPS came into the house to be reprogrammed with all the new streets and latest in travel updates, then it was time to reload the Quickbooks Pro that Ken returned to me this morning, then remove the heater in the fish tank which was not an easy job, reset it lower so the tank does not overheat and finally reset the kitchen breaker, something is causing it to fail over and over again, so hard to get the toaster to work if the power is out! I actually made plans to replace it, that is until I noticed the lights would not work either. Could it be the instant hot water heater under the sink? Not sure. Now I'm clearing my desk and getting ready for a huge workday tomorrow. In two weeks I've gone from staring at the walls to busy as can be. Praise the good Lord for the change in fortunes.
So now its time to head to bed, meeting Ken at 6:30 comes far too early for a Sunday.
Thank you my friends and family members for your willingness to be involved in our lives. You have helped us through a time when we had to say our final goodbyes to Nan, to cope with life without her and to then rebuild a meaningful life for the future. You have been with us every step of the way, we thank you.
Good night to all,

love

tim

Finally its friday night

Dear Family and Friends,
I hope this finds you contented and calm this evening. This week has certainly contained challenges and rewards for me. I've enjoyed working with the girls each morning and delivering them to school and the sitters, I've also enjoyed having an over abundance of work to do once again. Probably my busiest week of work this year and most are sales. I enjoy working with sales since someone is getting a new or used place, new to them, title company people, real estate agents, inspectors and appraisers are making a living and sellers are able to breath better with the property off their books or hands.
With Marilyn gone the house has seemed extra quiet but I know she is enjoying being back with her family. Unfortunately their sewer backed up and really made a mess of the basement but now that is behind them as well. Around here due to the ladies cleaning I've had a very low effort week to keep things in order, some very good meals, a really decent loaf of bread made better by including flax seeds during the baking process (thank you Ray). This morning while I waited for my angels to wake I called the IRS. Not only did I not have to wait for hours I happened to get to work with a very pleasant lady who helped me through the process. Things look very good for an agreement which will cover tax years 2005 and 2007 and set in place a plan to make the regular quarterly payments. My stress level was fairly high when I finally reached her but she was very helpful and let me know some things that I did not know before about the ease of making payments and possible amounts I would be expected to pay monthly. With that settled and to be finalized October 10Th the rest of the day went well. After delivering the girls I came home and quickly did research and drove to San Jose. Then after completing that inspection I drove to Pittsburg and then ended my work day in Concord. I was offered a check for $750 if I could drop by a Walnut Creek office so I included that in my day. Then home via Applebees where Pam via a gift certificate paid for my dinner, thanks Pam.
Arriving home I quickly prepared a deposit slip and took the money directly to the bank. The other check I picked up today has to be held one week for funds to be deposited, that creates a bit of a problem but it was the best the lady could do.
Now its Sabbath and like my brother said tonight in our brief phone call, Sabbath means a rest from all our labors, a chance to rebuild that special relationship with the Creator. I watched the pastor of La Sierra University as he spoke and enjoyed his fresh comments about what it means to belong to God's family.
Now I'm more than ready to hit the hay. I think the dogs are both ready and willing as well. I've enjoyed the emails from friends this week, many are inspiring, some are funny, some political and all thought provoking. Thanks for keeping me on your lists.
So I send my love, thinking tonight of Irene, Keith, Gerry and others who have special needs.
love

tim
ps Please remember Dana, Ronnie and their family, still no power and probably not back on for another week. Ron continues to keep the frigs cold with generators but how they long to be together again with power and some normalcy.

Kallie comes to visit, Starr guards!

Dear Family and Friends,

10:05, long day with no naps. With Ken out of town and no kido duty this morning I dragged myself out of bed and into the worn tennis shoes. I did my 3 mile circuit and then left for Roseville. It was a great house, huge lot, lots of upgrades and a beautiful home. After I finished I called Barb and Gerry to hook up for lunch but only got a message so hit Taco Bell and left town in a hurry. Back to the office for some work and to set up more orders, then picked up Kallie at 3:05 as her sitters were on their way to the doctors. I brought her home and took her out of her carrier and just sat and held her for a long time, she was enjoying watching the dogs and the dogs were both very excited to have her here. Finally I tried to feed her the bottle but she said no way, too cold, it took a while to get it warm enough and I placed her in a little reclining bed thing with lots of hanging toys to enjoy. She loved it and then I tried the bottle yet one more time and this time she decided to get it a try so I bent over for awhile holding it and she drank it almost dry. Then Nikki came with miss Keanna and took Kallie away. I did some more setting up orders, conditions and managed to totally forget to call the IRS, not good.

I went to grief group but our leader was climbing Mt Whitney so the group drifted a bit. They are great people but it goes better with a leader. A couple of the group are going in for surgery soon, others are just struggling with issues, some are better and had good news to report. I talked about the trip to Texas and getting to care for the girls.

Now I'm back home for a brief rest and then I head to San Jose in the morning after the kidos, then to Pittsburg, then Concord and finally home later in the afternoon. By tomorrow night I'll be ready to crash. My board is full of work seen, to see, to fix, to check out. Overnight I'm busy, how long it will last I don't know but I plan to do my best to care for my precious clients now that I have their trust.

Life is more pleasant with the cleaning and arranging changes the ladies made. The fish tank really needs attention but perhaps over the weekend that will be possible. We'll see.

Friends that need special prayer that I know of are Pam Whitted, Keith Tall, Gerry Lammerding and I'm sure there are plenty of others I'm not aware of.

Prayer and how it works or does not work, well its a mystery, but I'm sure not ready to quit praying. I end up talking to God about nearly everything, somethings I would not mention to any living soul and I know God is in charge when I ask Him to be.

I wish I could get all the things done in a day like Sylvia, her schedule is amazing and she seems to thrive on it, I'd croak from stress I think.

Tonight I'm very thankful for orders, checks, health, autumn weather, friends and precious family.

love

tim

Fresh baked bread - smells like home

Oh how I wish you were here to enjoy the aroma right now. My little loaf of wheat bread is just out of the bread maker and the whole house smells great. I've included a photo of the little gem. This one even looks like a loaf of bread!

This has been a busy day with orders, clients, appraisal production, more tax payments to the IRS and some busy work done as well.

The day started with my usual trip over to be with the girls while their parents left for their work. At 8:33 I delivered Keanna to the gate where she passed into the world of education. Then I drove Kallie to her sitters where she smiled and demonstrated her peace with the world once again. Then home to prepare breakfast, talk to Art and move to the office. Today I've gotten several appraisals out the door through email, taken orders, dealt with problems, cleared my desk, applied to a new lender to be on their appraiser panel, made yet another large payment to the IRS for past 941s after today's mail brought yet another check. Just now I tried to call the IRS only to find out they really do sleep, they were closed. I've never had that happen before.

This afternoon when I decided to take a break from paper pushing I edged the front lawn, mowed what lawn I have, loaded the dishwasher, decided to make bread and have already fed the hungry fish. At lunch time I went out to the garden plots and picked dozens of tomatoes, came in and ate several on peanut butter and my wheat bread. Talk about great tasting. This evening for dinner I made brown rice (90 second kind in the microwave), warmed up peas and a little cottage cheese. Great tastes and now I'm full.

Life in my slow lane is pretty fast lately. Tomorrow I'm to be in Roseville at 9:30 to 10. I can only do that because tomorrow I do not get to help with the morning routine and the girls, their daddy is going to get to do it. I'll get up early, walk and then hit the road for Roseville, then back to Concord if the order gets here tonight and then to Pittsburg if the people confirm the appointment. I need to be back in Discovery Bay by 3:30 to pick up Kallie as her sitters have to go to the doctor tomorrow. That will be fun and something to look forward to. I tell you these little ones really get into your heart. They are so precious and full of energy, love of life, learning and joy. For those of you who have decided that children were not going to be included in your life I tell you you are missing something precious. At least enjoy others children and get close to them. Children are a great reminder of how wonderful freedom and opportunity is here in America. We are free to raise them as we see fit, free to teach them about the Lord, to keep them safe. How blessed we are. In these worrisome financial times our families and our little kingdoms we have been blessed with mean even more to us. I'm thankful I have a lawn to mow, a car to drive, food to eat, a bed to rest in, friends to talk to, opportunities to make a living.

Some of you will know my friend Sue Miller. How wonderful to receive an email from her this afternoon relating her 9 minutes on the treadmill and the successful passing of the stress test!

So we move through life day by day, some good, some sleepy, some very hard, some stressful and some impossible yet onward we go.

I can't help thinking about the terrible situation in Houston and Galveston, lives have been trashed there and it will take months to rebuilt but rebuilding will happen and being Americans people will pull together, clean up the mess, start rebuilding and move forward. Tomorrow it could be us with a huge earthquake or a fire or a terrorist attack. These are not the good old days any more. These are days where we need to treasure every opportunity, hold fast to what we believe and make people first.

Yvonne Miller forwarded a wonderful UTube clip today where a little 13 year old boy discusses his faith and how much God suffered when He lost his Son. It is a wonderful clip. It is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0r_FbARIn8&NR=1 and if you have not seen it give it a try but have a box of tissues nearby just in case.

So my friends, another day, another dollar, another chance to be a friend, to do honest work, to love your family and those around you.

love

tim

The light of my life.........

Dear Family and Friends,

Oh wow I could use more hours. My day began at 6:10 with the awful alarm clock clanging, then to the shower, throw some clothes on and make a deposit at the bank, yes a nice fat deposit for a change, then watch the girls wake, make breakfast, race to the car and an on time arrival at school for Keanna. Then Kallie delivered to her sitters, then home to change cars, then golf course to pick up a new check, the lady decided during the night she wrote me a check fromt he wrong account, then back to bank to trade checks, then check back to the lady, then home to begin working. I used the time to write a purchase appraisal for a two unit property in Hayward, then it was 2 pm and time to pick up Keanna at school, then to the bank to pay an old 941, yes finally enough money to cover it, then back to work and Keanna did homework, then Nikki arrives and needs some air in a front tire.

I had a driveby appraisal to do for a foreclosure in Brentwood, then we met at Strings for dinner and Keanna began to sing songs she is learning at school. What a ham and talented little lady. She's got the words and actions down, what fun. She has a bit of Nikki's spaghetti and it had some garlic and she then proceeded to breathe on me knowing that garlic has a special odor. A very cute moment.

Now I'm home setting up more orders that have come in, no problem really, they reach from Rocklin to the Oakhurst with a few more local places thrown in, Antioch, Crockett, you name it. I'm delighted to have work and now its a matter of getting things completed in an orderly manner. It's a very nice kind of problem.

Tomorrow I talk to the IRS once again about working out an agreement for the years 2005 and 2007. 2006 is paid in full.

As I reflect over my life these last few days I can only be grateful for health, family, friends and opportunities.

I think we need to continue to remember Keith Tall as he battles to get back on his feet, for Jim Miller and his wife as they cope with the loss of their new office, up in smoke and flames yesterday. Now it will take a few weeks to have the repairs done before they can set up their special medical therapy office in Tracy. It must be discouraging for them. Fortunately they have the loving support of George and Yvonne and you can't get better support than that!

So good friends, good night

love

tim

Reflections

Good evening

Tonights blog will be mostly photos from Joe's party. The elderly lady is Mema, Nan's mother and the precious little girl with the balloons is Emma, one of Joe and Linda's grandchildren.

Today went well, got to see the girls this morning and then picked up Keanna after school. Had an interesting appraisal this evening. A really nice lady lost her husband two months ago after a long battle with cancer and needed an appraisal for the day of death. Dolly allowed me to take her a book that was actually purchased for Dolly regarding a widow and loss. It was a very interesting visit and one I felt very led by the Lord to make. She is actually doing very well, just does not know it yet and is searching for a reason to keep going with her life. I spent a couple hours there and we talked through lots of things. She has been an especially hard day and she has had to deal with more crying than usual, wondered what was happening to her. Materials Sylvia has shared helped a lot in the discussion. Ideas like fake it until you make it, in other words get out and act as if you are doing OK and sooner or later your feelings about being OK will follow.

This has been a very good day, tight on time, several checks came in just in time to help with the beloved IRS. I'm thankful for life and for friends and family. Who could ask for more?

Love

tim

ps the large poster you see in a couple of the photos contains photos of Joe with various movie starts, John Wayne, Richard Widmark, Fabian and others that were in the movie, the Alamo.

Miracle at 5387 Willow Lake Court!

Hi
I'm back from a quick weekend, photos tomorrow night I promise. Got up at 2 am CA time and 4 am Texas time this morning to make a flight and through a series of mini miracles I arrived in Oakland at 11:15 this morning. Worked my way home seeing a couple properties and then was totally blown away by what LeAnn and Sylvia had done. My floors shine, the counters gleam, the cobwebs are gone, I hear the spiders crying even now, books are on their way to a library, sacks of trash are ready for pickup in the morning. Wow, curtains are washed, sinks are amazing, how do they do that? Dogs are just in awe of everything so clean. Thank you so much for all the loving cleaning work! Wow. And as I was trying to thank Sylvia as she left today she looked me in the eye and said, I enjoy cleaning! What a novel concept, it shows. You really should come to visit quickly before I have a chance to mess it up again.
As you might imagine I'm very sleepy, tired and eyes are burning and 6:15 comes early in the morning.
It was wonderful in Texas. This is the nicest family filled with friendly characters, you are never bored when you are around this bunch. I am so delighted I was included in the birthday celebration, I loved it.

Good night my friends and family,
love

tim

A great day here in Eastland Texas

Dear Family and Friends,

I am writing this evening from my little room here in Eastland. The day has been incredible. This morning Dana picked me up and we went to visit Mema, Nan's mother at her rest home. I was amazed she recognized me. After a brief visit Dana showed me around town and we located the place where a surprise birthday part for Joe would be held. At 3 pm this afternoon David brought Joe to the hotel and as Joe walked in a group of family and friends shouted Happy Birthday. Joe was totally surprised and delighted. His wife Linda had worked hard to prepare for the event. The children had all pitched in and the day turned out well. Even Mema was brought over for the afternoon and she loved seeing everyone.

After a few hours of fun for little children and adults alike the party came to an end and many made the move over to the ranch where Joe and Linda reside. We sad out in a very green lawn in the shade of huge trees, watched the little kids play and talked. Gradually the dark found us and we finally had to move into the house. Frequent warnings about rattle snakes kept us on guard.

Now I am back in the room ready for a rest and a quick trip to Love Field in Dallas for a noon flight home. I am sorry to leave so quickly as Texas is a wonderful place with warm and friendly people. To be included in this family gathering is a very special honor. I am very touched by this gesture.

During the day Dana received several calls from her husband Ron. Ron decided to ride out the storm and remain in Houston last night. During the night the wind blew over a large lemon tree, took away the central air conditioning unit, downed a neighbors tree onto their roof. Ron rose to a world without electrical power but was prepared with generators. So the refrigerators are running with the power supplied as is a TV set for news and one wall AC. He is urging Dana to remain here at Joe and Linda's for the next week until the power comes back on.

So tomorrow I fly home.

This has been an exciting break in my normal survival routine. The trip was supplied by Dana through a pink pass from Southwest Airlines. I'll be back in time for a full work day on Monday and will see two properties each paying COD. Nice! I'll care for Kidos Monday morning and be back in the harness again.

The reason I could not share where I was going was the chance that Joe would access the blog and discover the secret party. Makes perfect sense now!

So good friend and family,

Sending love to each and every one of you.

tim

Photos are of the birthday boy Joe and little 3 year old Emma, Joe's grandaughter

On the road

Good evening,
This evening, 12:39, I am writing from middle America. Tomorrow night I'll tell you more about the trip. I've been in the air since 1 pm with excellent flights and safety all around. Everything has gone as planned and I feel blessed. My only regret is that my kids can't be here with me this evening.
A very special thanks to Lois who stood in for me today at Keanna's school. Keanna's class had prepared a special event this afternoon from 1 pm to 2 pm and since I was out of town Lois was kind enough to attend, take video and Keanna loving having her there. This just illustrates how I feel about the people that surround me and the family, very kind and helpful. I just hope that we are as helpful back to others.
The puppies seemed to understand that they were being left in LeAnn's care today as they hung around the door when I walked out with the suitcases and kept asking, can we go? Well I think that is what they were asking in their own way.
I had fun with the kidos this morning, Kallie slept in but Keanna was downstairs early today, awake and ready to face the day. She was actually down there before her alarm even went off and we made it on time to school.
For those of you watching the hurricane lets just say I'm a lot closer to it now than I was this morning yet all is quiet and still here, not even any wind. Not yet a least.
It felt very strange to board a plane without Nan today, we've traveled to medical centers in Portland, Boston, Houston, City of Hope in LA and today was really the first time I've been back on a Southwest plane for over a year. Something have changed and the Oakland Airport certainly has changed. The new terminal is open and its beautiful. I had a fine lunch of rye, swiss cheese, lettuce and tomato along with a bowl of freshly made vegetable soup. A very good and tasty meal.
I'm hoping your weekend is off to a great start, that you have some special time together and that God can reach into your hearts and bless you in a moving way.
Love to all from here,

Tim

Busy Thursday

Dear Family and Friends,

What a busy day! I got up at 4:55 this morning and wrote an appraisal, then walked with Ken at 6:30, then took Marilyn to the Oakland airport at 10:30 where she caught a flight. Then I drove to Hayward and located a tract of new homes, talked them into sharing a couple comps with me, shot the photos and then drove to El Cerrito to shoot 3 more comp photos, all dumps suggested by a nasty underwriter. Then I drove to Martinez to shoot two more photos of the side of a home I had already inspected a few weeks ago, again at underwriter urging. Then across the new Benicia bridge to Vallejo and Olive Garden for some soup and salad. Was I hungry or did it taste better today than usual? It was so good. Sat at the bar and talked to the bartender. he was leaving for a weekend vacation and going to Tahoe for the first time. To Camp Richardson no less, a place I love so we talked a bit. Then back into the bug for the run up to Rohnert Park to see a work / live condo, shoot the comps and head back to Brentwood to see the girls at tumbling. Then to the grief group and now I'm here talking to you sharing my day. How was your day? rewarding, exciting, dull, frightening, joyful? While I was in group I felt a strange buzzing, my phone had a message that Marilyn was home and safe in Rhode Island, good news indeed.

Now off to bed since I wake the kidos in the morning and that comes early, later I'm taking a little flight which I'll explain more later.

Can you imagine how thrilled I was to come home to three orders for next week. Wow, something to do to keep me alert and on the ball.

Tonight I'm thankful for the many miles driven today without any incident and with cool AC to keep me comfortable. These little pleasure we get used to can sure make a difference in our quality of life.

I've not heard how Keith Tall is doing but lets keep him in our prayers, back and leg pain I believe is causing him trouble.

Sending love to all this evening, with all the troubles we face its a good life, well worth living.

love

tim

ps The photos are from the gym tonight, aren't they cute?

Marilyn set to fly home tomorrow

Dear Family and Friends,
After confronting a very busy Friday at the airport for flights heading to the east coast Marilyn decided to try flights tomorrow. Since she is flying on a pink pass on Southwest she has to find flights with open seats. It looks good for a flight leaving Oakland at 11:45 tomorrow. How different it will be around here without her smiling face and cheery disposition. She has been a great help in the process of moving forward to a more normal approach to life for me. I think she has had a great time too enjoying her friends and family in Sacramento, spending time down at Jason and Jo's and time with Nikki and Steve. She has helped with the little ones, purchased groceries, helped with the birthday party, sorted things, cleaned Nan's desk and read about a thousand books I think. She has supervised getting the DVR and cable repaired, made great friends with Lois and Ray, enjoyed catching up with Ken and LeAnn and the sunsets over the lake. Now she returns to the east where her family waits, a little 8 year old boy needs his Grammy.
Tomorrow after I drop Marilyn off I head into a full day of fixing prior appraisals, reinspecting properties, traveling to Rohnert Park for a new one and then hopefully getting home to see Keanna at tumbling and then on to the grief group. We'll see how the day goes, towns to visit include Hayward, El Cerritos, Rohnert Park and Martinez. It will be nice to use the bug with its renewed AC. Today brought checks in the mail and credit cards payments as well. Marilyn went with me to inspect a fine home in Brentwood today, a large two story home which is only 4 years old and is bank owned. Now selling for just $400K. When will this terrible market turn around? For many of us the turn cannot come soon enough.
This evening Marilyn took Lois and me to the Boardwalk and as we ate the darkness fell upon us. The food was good and the weather was perfect.
This morning was another of those special times, Keanna snuggled under her pink blanket not wanting to get up at all, Kallie catching a few more winks before the day started and then the mad rush to get the car loaded, the girls secured inside and the trip to school to be the gate closing. We made it with minutes to spare and off she trudged with back pack in hand, poorly fixed hair flying for her day at school. How proud I am of these little people.
I love all the emails that have been coming this way with funny tidbits about life. They make me chuckle.
Today I was able to cover the van payment, cover a couple other bills and sort of catch up a bit. Not as much as I need to but making progress.
Good night my friends and family, looking forward to seeing many of you soon.

love

tim

Busy day, Keanna does the park...

Good evening,
What an exciting day, well at least for a tired old Pappa. At the kids house at 6:30, nap in the recliner until 7:30 when Keanna gets up, dresses, comes down to eat the breakfast I have prepared, then wake up Kallie who beams a huge smile when you enter her room, then get them loaded up and down the road. This morning Keanna and I were pretty sure we were going to be late and she was very worried about it, the gate was still open, nice! Then I came home to deliver the van to Marilyn for her day in Sac. Ask me if she is home yet? Not! Then to work in the office. More orders came in, conditions to fix and send, computer issues but finally solved. Then Ken, an appraiser friend, came to do the value as of the date of death for Dec. 4. It was very nice to catch up with him and he confirms that there is hardly any work out there at all. He used the S word several times, survival!
I picked up Keanna at 2 at the school and brought her home where she watched DVD's that Lois provided, had Cheerios and Ritz crackers and then suggested we go to the park. So I put work aside and we walked to the park. She played with several other kids and their dogs for what seemed a long time. Then we walked back home having enjoyed perfect weather and a great time in the sun. We drove her home and went to Tracy to enjoy Olive Garden. This evening we would especially like to thank Ken and LeAnn for the gift certificate given on my birthday. Thanks so much.
Now its time to head to bed. It is such an honor to be able to help care for the little ones. They are precious gifts from God and very easy to love and cherish.
Tomorrow will be a hard work day and on Thursday I am actually seeing a couple properties. Now if they will all just pay up things would be even nicer for all.
I'm trying very hard to work out of the positive memories file cabinet and enjoy the blessings of each day, become open to God's leading, be aware of the needs of others and rise to the challenge of doing good work in a timely manner.
You fit into this plan. I know that many of you have been waiting to see how I would turn out, will I find my way forward? will I rediscover the zest for living? will I get a grasp on my physical health and live better? Well lets all just stay tuned and find out.

I think I have the best bunch of family and friends in the world. There is not a bad one in the bunch, how can that be?
love

tim

The two file cabinets

Dear Family and Friends,
As I work through the book Dolly sent to me I continually challenged to move to a more positive manner of living. This evening I was reading where Joel speaks of a person having two file cabinets in the mind, one where all the negative and awful things are stored and the other where all the blessings and good memories are stored. He suggested that as we live we have a choice to constantly go back to the file where terrible, unfair and awful memories exist and replay them in our mind or instead turn to the file where good memories and positive things are stored and dwell on these things. What a challenging picture this presents. Give up on feeling sorry and regretful over the bad things that have happened, give up on bringing them up over and over again and turn to living life in a positive manner, replaying excellent memories and events, of kindnesses extended and the good of life.
This morning I had a great opportunity. It did not feel like that when the alarm finally went off at 6 am. All night I kept waking to hope that the alarm would go off on time, I didn't want to let the kids down, they were counting on me being there to help with the girls. I was using an alarm clock that I have seldom used. It worked perfectly and I think I'll sleep with more confidence tonight. This morning I arrived at Nikki and Steve's about 6:20, Nikki was getting ready to leave and Steve was also preparing to head out for his day of work. I rested in a nice recliner until Kallie began to stir around 7. Then I went up and was greeted with such a wonderful smile. We went downstairs and later Keanna woke, dressed and prepared for her day. I made a breakfast, put Kallie in her swing where she continued to smile and play happily. Then at the appointed time we boarded the van and headed to school to deliver Keanna just on time and then find the sitter for Kallie. Then it was home for a breakfast and shower. We left soon afterwards for Hayward after dropping the bug off for AC work. We made a quick trip to Hayward, inspected the condo, shot comps and left for the school back in Disco Bay to pick up Keanna. I was a few minutes early and Keanna was happy to see me. We came home where she worked on watching a movie and doing her homework, had a little snack of Cheerios. Nikki came later to pick her up for dance class.
This evening we headed out for cat food, fish food and people food which we found in Antioch. After a nice dinner we are home with Marilyn watching deal or no deal and I'm blogging to you my friends. A couple orders came in today which I was glad to receive.
I'm thinking of my friend Keith Tall this evening. At church I learned that he is having some very severe pains in his back, bad enough that he cannot sleep very well and is sometimes forced to sleep in a recliner. I think he needs our prayers, Keith Tall, one of the really good guys!
When we picked up the bug tonight the bill was only $138, one small broken valve and new freon and we are running cool again. Nice!
So my friends and family, check out where you get your stimulus for life, the file of bad or the file of good memories. I'm choosing to work out of the good file. In our grief group some of the dear people relate how poorly they are cared for by family and friends as they go through their rough times. I'm sorry but I cannot relate to that personally. I feel like Nan and I and now the entire family has been treated with such loving support and kindness, with genuine love and compassion. I have no bad impressions from anyone. No one could ever ask for better support than what I have received. Thank you so much for showing the hand of God over and over to me no matter what we and now I faced over the past years.

love

tim

Sunday evening, ready for the week

Dear Family and Friends,
Meet Pappa daycare! Tomorrow morning at about 6:30 I'll be at Nikki and Steve's to help Keanna and Kallie get to the sitters and school. Nikki has laid out a very carefully planned schedule as to what happens every 15 minutes after I arrive. It will be interesting and a great adventure for me. After the children are delivered then Marilyn and I drop off the bug for AC work and drive on to Hayward to conduct a condo appraisal, then back to Discovery Bay to pick up Keanna at 2 pm where she will come home with me until Nikki gets home from work. Steve has a great work opportunity for the next two weeks and in times like these one can't pass it up. The week is shaping up well for me with several orders in place and properties to see.
Marilyn and I drove the motorhome up last evening to Jackson and parked at the RV park on the Indian Casino grounds. Marilyn enjoys playing pennys and amazingly ended up winning nearly $400. The RV park was wonderful, just 70 miles from Discovery Bay and very cheap at $27 for full hookups. The park has 100 spaces, grassy lawns, huge clubhouse, huge pool and two spas, full Internet hookups and cable TV with even HBO. I walked the dogs this morning on a trail which surrounds the park. While it was very warm during the day it cooled down nicely last night. Marilyn was nice enough to put gas in the motorhome today, buy breakfast, As this was her last weekend I wanted to do something I knew she would enjoy. When you sign in as guests at the RV park they give you free coupons worth $10 each. Marilyn went on to turn that $10 into hundreds of dollars. While I sat in the spa last night in the cool evening she was over at the casino willing money. I'm very happy for her. They allow smoking and after a bit I could not handle the smoke, my lungs reacted so I took the shuttle back to the RV and got ready for bed. The dogs loved the trip and enjoyed walking at the park.
Now the motorhome is back parked where it lives in the storage yard and I'm gathering things together at my desk for tomorrow. I'm looking forward to cooler weather soon as the heat is not pleasant to cope with at all.
How is your week lining up? Are you feeling well? Got things scheduled and ready? Do you have together time planned for you and your someone?
I'm expecting to have an excellent week.

Sending love to all

Tim

Sabbath evening

Dear Family and Friends,
Keanna came to visit last night and that was magic. She finally fell asleep about 9 after her mom called to say there had been an earthquake. the got her attention. I walked with Ken this morning and when I got back she and Marilyn were downstairs playing. I made breakfast for Keanna which she slowly ate and then returned her to her mother at 8:30. Then I went back home and snoozed a bit and got ready for church.
It was a very good experience to sit in church, to sing in church, to try out different parts, I can now sing bass as well as tenor. We heard wonderful special music, reports about the back to school night at the local church sponsored school, a sneak preview of the speaker next week, a report by Sylvia on the search for a new pastor for Tracy, how we miss Jim! Then Rod stood to speak, Rod Western is a pretty amazing guy. He can do a lot of things including telling a pretty good bible story, today Daniel came to life, Rod did a great job of inspiring, reminding and encouraging us to live for what we believe. Then it was back to the bug where the AC finally totally gave out so I just drove faster going home. I rested some and made a snack of a slice of my bread with peanut butter, sharp cheese and fresh tomatoes from Steve and Keanna's garden. Talk about good. I know Pam thought I was totally weird having peanut butter and cheese but protein rules and I happen to really love peanut butter with most things.
It seems hardly possible that in a week Marilyn will be heading home to Rhode Island. Her stay has been a very big encouragement for the family and for me as well. I think she has enjoyed herself too in the process but she does miss her kidos on the east coast.
It was so good to be reminded today of just how special living in America is, free to worship, free to travel, to succeed, to launch your kids into their futures.
So I bid each one of you a good night or morning depending on when you are reading this. I was so touched by Dave's prayer request today for people he has met as he works neighborhoods for the Lord, nearly everyone is facing something serious, how we need each other and how good it is to have each other.

love to all,


Tim

Keanna and Kallie come to visit!

Dear Ones,

This evening Keanna is our guest. She finally finished her professional delaying antics and went to sleep about 9 just after Nikki called to report the earthquake. Keanna talked to her mom about it on the phone and was a bit concerned about going to sleep without being with her parents. She colored and wrote letters in her coloring book this evening, ate her dinner well and visited a bit with Marilyn and me. She is growing up so fast, is so sweet and fiery at the same time. What a kid, what a precious little girl. Kallie was here earlier and was happy to smile, wave her hands and just be with her mom after having Nikki gone for 4 days back at work. Tomorrow Nikki will spend the day with her girls.

We finally got to give a tiny something back today. Sylvia experienced a dead battery yesterday, after 5 years it was very tired so Marilyn and I helped Sylvia put in the new battery. An engine starting never sounds better than just after a new battery. We made a great team, mission accomplished.

Another order came in today through the fax machine and I'll see it on Monday. I'll be so happy when this current heat wave moves on, having it close to 100 all the time gets old after a few days. This afternoon I went out and mowed my tiny yard in spite of the heat, it just needed to be done. I have so much admiration for Steve who mows 19 yards now with his landscaping business. How he can take the heat house after house I do not know. I'm sure he drinks lots of water. He is determined to do whatever it takes to care for his family!

Nikki was back to work at for the Department of Energy for the federal government. She serves as an auditor and in general loves her job. But any job that takes one away from a precious new baby is tough to handle. Next week Steve is starting on a two week gig that requires him to leave at 6:30 in the morning so I'll be switching to pappa day care for a few days. I'll be at their home at 6:30 in the morning and deliver Keanna and Kallie to school and baby sitter, then start my day. Its the least I can do to help them and I get to see the kidos every day that way. I'll have to start walking at night or on the treadmill in the evenings. I'll miss the walks with Ken but in a couple weeks I'll be back to keep him in line.

This morning I took Starr and Lady to the park for a walk. I've very concerned about Starr, she no longer races up the stairs at night when its time to go to bed like she always has before. She has trouble even jumping up on the couch or the chair. I'm thinking I need to take her in for a checkup but that takes time and money. As it is the bug decided to stop cooling today so on Monday it goes back for an AC checkup.

I well remember how low I was last Friday night and how defeated I found myself feeling. Then the amazing help handed to me by Bob Miller, passing on some pretty astounding kindness from someone. How good it felt to see the house payments clear the bank on Tuesday, how deeply I felt the divine hand. I guess I was complaining about no response to my stair chair ad in craigs list because Carol from N. Carolina wrote a comment reminding me that I should wait for God's timing and it would sell when it really needed to, sound advice which I appreciated.

We happened to have a little watermelon in the frig and Marilyn decided it needed to be opened up and enjoyed. Wow, what a pleasure it has been, even Keanna had a piece tonight, God certainly knows how to make things taste well, no fat, no salt, no sugar added, just straight water melon, oh so good.

Well it is time to head to bed as Ken has proposed we walk at 6:30 in the morning when it is cool. Keanna knows to let Marilyn know she is awake if she happens to get up early when I'm gone but I think she's sleep right through until I get back.

Sending love and deepest appreciation to each and every one of you tonight. Life is precious, a gift and I think we should each do the very best we can with what we have. I'm feeling its time to stop drifting and get going again. Will you join me in this adventure called the rest of our lives?

love

tim

September 4, 9 months since Nan fell asleep in Jesus.

I'm just back from the Thursday evening grief group. Tonight was a bit different. Our guy who just three weeks ago was in very serious condition in the hospital was there with his quick wit, freshly showered and fully engaged in the discussions. No one was was reporting life threatening issues tonight, instead there was general positive comments and some down right funny moments. Someone brought excellent brownies and the discussion ran overtime. It was a great evening.
Just before the group I drove in to watch Keanna at tumbling class and to see Kallie and Nikki. Before I left Marilyn produced some really great haystacks, excellent eating, a real feast. Lois was able to join us and it was fun to take minute out to just relax and enjoy good food.
The day started with the traditional walk, then shower, the breakfast of oats, thin slice of my bread, banana. Lunch was a griller with mushrooms built in, a new product. This morning a phone call yielded two appraisal orders and this afternoon at 3 found me measuring a local home and then doing an appraisal of an empty lot. Payment was up front with a credit card, a very nice blessing for the day. Also a check arrived in the mail for appraisal work done quite awhile ago. Checks are a blessing and a great help in paying for health care, car payments, life insurance and other business expenses.
This afternoon I was busy writing up the appraisal from Marysville and the broker called who had ordered the appraisal. In the course of the conversation he casually dropped the comment, oh the Marysville one cancelled. I was shocked, I've drive there, inspected the house and now I'm told its cancelled. Then the magic words, but I've asked the homeowner to mail a check for the appraisal. That was very good news! Sometimes I am amazed at the people I work with. Mostly I'm grateful for their orders but sometimes I'm just amazed at their behavior.
At this time of the year I begin to look longing toward a cooler time when we won't need AC all the time and the nights will cool down quicker and fall with be with us. Keanna was explaining to me today that fall was when the leaves start to turn yellow. I'm looking forward to that time as well.
Today marked the 9Th month since Nan's passing. It has been an amazing journey, a time of discovery, heart break, defeat and ultimately recover for our family. We miss this amazing woman of courage, of spunk, of joy and will never never forget her legacy.
So my friends and family, yet another chapter is opened in this thing we call life. I am expected great things, I believe in people, opportunity and God's amazing grace. When you let yourself be with Him you are never really alone again.
love to all,

Tim

The doctor says no, the blood work shows improvement

Dear Family and Friends,
This evening as I write I'm reflecting on an unusual day. For the first time in my life a doctors office called and said, don't come for tomorrow's appointment, you owe us money. The cardiologist's scheduler called to say that unless I could pay the bill in full, about $570, the doctor would not see me. At first I was pretty disturbed by the news. At that moment I was overdrawn about $400 at the bank although I did not know it but I did know there was no way I had the funds to pay the doctor the co pays I owed him now. As I thought about it I decided to call back and ask that they fax the results of the blood work to me so I could get at least some idea of how I was doing. After a second phone call they finally did but the resulting fax was so dark I could not read it, then later in the day the faxs came through again and that time could be read clearly. I'll share some of the numbers and let you give me feed back on what they mean. The total cholesterol was 87, the HDL was 40, the LDL was 14 and the Triglycerides were 102. These number compare to the last blood work a couple months ago when the total cholesterol was 191, the HDL was 33, the LDL was 129 and the triglycerides were 202. So the trend seems to be in the right direction. As I thought over my situation I decided to make an appointment with Dr. Edwards who is my GP and by the way is paid up. His co pays are much lower and more reasonable. When Debra, his front desk guru called back to set up an appointment she had pulled my file and discovered that Jim had written out some instructions, he wants the Crestor 40 mg reduced to 20 mg every other day. Sounds good to me. I'll see him in a little over a week. He also runs a very successful weight clinic which I'll talk to him about when I'm there. Sylvia was my counselor today and was very helpful in helping me think this through.
I inspected a nice home in Rio Vista Trilogy today, a 55 and over community. The home was nice and the poor lady had just lost her husband the 30Th of August but wanted me to be there so tax matters could be in order as soon as possible. Here I am 9 months later and only today I finally hooked up with my appraiser friend who is coming the first of next week to do the appraisal for me.
As I pulled into the driveway this afternoon from Rio Vista I found a check in the mailbox. That one along with the one I had collected today helped bring the bank account back into the black side. So many automatics come out this time of the month and of course they are relentless, they just come out whether there are funds there or not.
This evening Lois suggested we break up the boredom after working hard all afternoon and we visited the local Subway. A good sandwich on wheat bread was the perfect answer, tons of lettuce, good tomatoes and a few olives. Oh did I mention a touch of mayo and some cheese too.
Then it was home to hear Gov. Palin speak. I just stopped working and sat with Marilyn and we listened and enjoyed hearing a new voice in the mix, a good communicator and a someone believable.
Tomorrow Ken and I will walk early and then I'll settle in to complete a couple appraisals and start beating the bushes for more work. When I spoke to my friend Ken who is a local appraiser he confirmed my situation that there is very little work to be had, not enough to keep on going right now.
This evening my bank on line finally caught up with transactions from Tuesday and it felt so very good to see both house payments clear the bank, thanks to the generosity of someone who was a huge help. I don't think anyone can understand just how big of help until you are in my situation where most everything is somewhat of a challenge right now. You were a huge help on so many levels.
Please pray that someone will notice the add for the stair chair, it would sure be nice to sell it. Would help so much with finances.
I'm feeling pretty well right now, I'm very dizzy when I first get up in the morning or have to lay down on the floor and then move but that's been with me for a long time. The walking goes really well with Ken and we walk pretty fast, I've tried to have more veges lately although I'm still snacking much more than I should. At least I'm drinking plenty now. When I stop to think then I realize I have so much to be thankful for, mostly my precious kids and their precious kids. They are all wonderful.
Good night to each one of you. Let me know what you think about the blood work results. I'm thinking it could have been worse.

love

tim

Marilyn returns

Dear Family and Friends,
10 pm and time to blog and sleep. This has been a day of busy work and production. Ken and I walked this morning, then oatmeal and a surprise visit from Steve, Kallie and their swimming wonder dog. It was great to see them again, Kallie was smiling and cooing, Meela was swimming and bringing back the ball, Lois and LeAnn both were on their back decks, it was a nice time. Then they were gone and it was time for me to go back to work again. While it was difficult to really produce because to do so I had to keep jumping back and forth between the laptop and the desktop in the lower office. Two new orders came in, one for Steve and one for me. I'm heading out in the morning to Rio Vista to see a home and collect a check, yea!
Finally I completed an appraisal this evening only to have it bounce back when I tried to email it to the lender.
Jim called to say my computer is repaired and working again. He even managed to get the flash player to load, a real accomplishment. A power supply gave up causing the computer to fail. He has spent hours on it and his fee is very reasonable. After Marilyn and I ate at the Boardwalk this evening we picked the computer up and its now back in the office, not hooked up yet but at least its back again.
Once again the mail brought nothing money wise today. However I heard from three different lenders who are mailing checks out today so the next few days could see at least some money arrive. Thanks to the miracle of the weekend I was able to pay the house payments in full. I'm sure you can imagine how thrilled I am to have made the payments.
At this point I've not had any calls on the stair chair so I'm thinking I need to get the word to the right places, places where people who are in need of such equipment can hear about it, not sure yet where that is but I'm thinking I need to get the word out better.
Lately I've noticed that when its time for a meal I actually feel faint until I get something in. Perhaps I need to check my blood sugar at those times to see if it is dropping too low. Today for lunch I made lima's, cut up a ripe tomato and had a little cottage cheese too. This evening I had a garden burger. The current loaf of bread came out the best yet. It is dense, tasty and cuts perfectly. I'm really quite proud of it.
Marilyn came home this afternoon full of stories from her week in Sacramento. Sounds like she had a great time and was able to help the people she spent time with. I know her grandson is missing her in Rhode Island and one of these days I will lose her but for now she is anxious to get to work on Nan's desk in the office. I tell you this girl can file and sort like a pro.
Well 6 am comes early as does the 6:30 walking time.
I am very thankful for many things, for many people and for a great family. To all of you I say thanks.
love

tim