Rest day

Good evening friends and family,
Since last night I've had a stress free Sabbath. I slept in until almost 8 am. We walked the dogs in the park, we had a late breakfast at the Byron Inn, we watched Loma Linda Worship Service, sat in recliners with the fire roaring and took turns having naps while beautiful pictures and music were on the Christian Satelite channels, we had dinner this evening at Olive Garden, Jerry has taught me a lot of things about living with diabetes since he has had it for years, wears an insulin pump and manages his sugar blood levels very well. Just now we had peaches that Joyce and Glen canned and brought to us long ago. Jerry had me buy some fat free, sugar free Coolwhip and the peaches with some coolwhip on tops, well its better than most deserts. What a treat, thanks Joyce for the jam I eat every morning on my one piece of wheat toast and the fruit I have nearly every day as well. Thank you Marilyn Bitzer for the green beans that lasted until last week so I got more at the store. Jerry often speaks of how fortunate I am to be surrounded by such a loving and caring group of friends and family, he is so right.
We had planned to go to church today in Tracy but Jerry walked out of his trailer in Sac and left all his hanging clothes behind so we've stayed low key.
How nice it has been to enjoy the fire burning, the music, the naps and the great conversation remembering our childhood and his many memories of Nan as well. It is easy to remember Nan through so many different parts of our adult lives. This afternoon we drove to the graveside and spent quiet time regretting that Nan is resting there instead of up and with us in our lives. What a loss.
I'm beginning to get into one of the 4 books our friend Karen sent. She is a GIST friend and the books she sent are very deep and helpful about grief and loss. I'm already learning as I begin to read and to appreciate the terrible place God is at when such a loss takes place. He just loves His children and never wants anything bad to happen in their lives but we also have an enemy who will do anything he can to hurt, destroy and injure. Cancer is his doing.
I appreciate the emails and messages that I have received today. Wes has a really great idea for soup and I can't wait to try it.......
So as I think of things another week has come to a close and a new one is upon us. This week will have highlights, a colonoscopy!!, a visit to the dentist!!
I'm interested in how you are doing, what issues you are facing, how are your relationships going? What have you done lately to allow the ones you love to know for sure you treasure them? Words, kind gestures, phone calls, loving touches.... you have the power to make someone's life more fun, more secure, more meaningful. so use the power now while you can, you see I can't now, what I have done for Nan has to be enough for there are no second changes or going back. Yes I did pretty good by her when she needed me most but there were hundreds of times I could have enhanced her life that I was too busy with work, or being on the phone, or doing selfish things when I could have done more. No I don't beat myself up because I did step up to the plate when I needed to and we worked together at holding her life together as long as possible, we did well, I just wish I would have started loving her in overdrive sooner.

How can I help you, don't ask for a loan right now OK? But are there things I can do to help you, do you happen to know of people who could benefit from some of Nan's clothes? They are here, or who need Gleevec, I have months worth, or anything I can do to help, let me know. My biggest enemy is being alone with no one to need me. While I treasure time spent with the kids and their kids I want them to be able to live their lives without my being in the way either.

Take care my friends, my family, I love you all

Tim
ps Thank you Donna for sharing Jerry with me this weekend. Its been great to have him here.