Finally a cool one

Dear Family and Friends,

Finally today was a cool day, my house AC which is set on 79 degrees never came on as the cool breezes blew through all afternoon. I busied myself around the house today with attempting to have Belgium Waffles this morning only to discovery Nan's high power waffle maker no longer warms up, worked perfectly when Dana was here but not this time. Ray and Lois were coming over since I did not want to try to eat the entire batch of waffles the batter makes but I had to ask them to bring a waffle iron. They did and things worked out fine. Then Ray started to help out with little tasks, like fixing the waffle iron, fixing a door that will not stay closed in the motorhome, solving why the leveler will not work right and also solving the mirrored door for the medicine cabinet for the bedroom in the motorhome. So I have Ray loaded up with projects now. Sure appreciate his wisdom and help.

I did some filing, worked on a report, baked a new loaf of bread. You know I'd bake bread just to have that wonderful smell fill the house. It just smells like home! I walked the big 3 miles this morning and have sort of drifted from one project to another, I cleaned out the frig getting rid of left overs and fruits and veges that had gone bad, threw out some dated freezer stuff, made peas for lunch and soup for dinner, mocha smoothie this afternoon and tasted a thin slice of fresh bread when it came out.

Tomorrow I need to really settle down and get things written and ready to deliver. Its also time to take the motorhome back to its home at the RV park before the association begins to throw a fit. Its the one negative about living in the older end of Discovery Bay, the miserable association. Its amazing how much grief they can deliver for the $25 fee each of us pay once a year.

I've found myself reliving yesterday all day, waves of gratitude wash over me as I realize how much I was helped yesterday and what a difference it has made on my outlook. The first thing I did this morning was to log into Craig's list and learn how to do a listing. Then I shot photos of the stair chair and went through the steps laid out. Now the stair chair is listed. Its a first step and my prayer is that the right person will learn about this helpful device. I also pray that readers of Craig's list will be drawn to Art and Connie's motorhome which is also listed there. How they would like to move on and sell the motorhome.

I received a very warm email from Marilyn Bitzer who lives in Lincoln at a Del Webb retirement development. She lost Cal, her husband of many years several years before I lost Nan. Cal worked with us and he and Marilyn have been our friends for many years. She has been a constant provider of courage and good advice. I tend to give special attention to guidance from someone who has experienced a recent lose of a spouse. What they have to say is very important. Marilyn's words are also faith building and they were just that today. How good to hear from her. I also had an opportunity to talk with Irene tonight, she is amazing and her faith is strong. She is working along with others to hold a GIST fund raising walk in San Jose at the end of October. As I learn more I'll share the details with you. I'm looking forward to helping raise funds for GIST research. Irene began the radiation treatments already and thinks she can feel relief from the intense tumor pain already. I'm not surprised as Nan also found relief almost immediately when she had radiation on an offending tumor. It is a rarely used treatment for GIST so Irene is somewhat a pioneer once again. She continues to need our prayers for healing, courage and faith.

Tomorrow is yet another holiday to be spend without Nan. Nan was always up to the challenge of making these days off special. I miss her as you do too. It is a different world without Nan, not a bad world, just different, less fun, more challenging and way more stressful. Yes Nan you are still missed, every day, every hour.

Thank you to those who helped so much this weekend.

God bless each and every one of you.

love

tim

ps want to buy a great stair chair? I happen to have one for sale!

Overwhelmed by mercy

Good evening,
Last evening I conveyed how I was feeling, pretty low and uncertain about how to cover a looming house payment. Doubt and discouragement seemed to engulf me and my faith was pretty weak. I continued talking with the Lord about it as I fell into my normal deep slumber. I woke this morning looking forward to a brisk walk but without a lot of hope still. I knew the day would have some bright spots but I had no idea of what was to come. I picked up Keanna in the bug and we drove to Sabbath School. We had hardly arrived before we got into a little power struggle and Keanna was unhappy with me, I too was very unhappy as getting to bring Keanna to Sabbath School is one of life's nicest joys and here I was managing to mess it up. It was then that Bob Miller, church treasurer, caught my attention at the door and I went out to speak with him. To my surprise he handed me an envelope. At the moment I did not realize what a huge blessing it contained. I had no idea until much later that it contained God's answer to my house payment. I just want to say how grateful I am for the help that someone extended and it turned my weekend around. For awhile I was in shock, disbelief and then it gradually dawned on me, God had provided just the help that was needed at just the right hour. I am humbled, gratified and bowled over and so thankful this evening for everything that happened. Thank you Lord, thank you for the extreme generosity. When I realized what was happening my first thought was gratefulness, the next a driving desire to do everything I could to ward off getting into such a frightful place again. Tomorrow the stair chair gets listed for sale and soon after the boat goes up for sale too. This generous reprieve deserves my best responses.
But this very lifting bright spot was not to be the only bright spot, blessing today for during the worship hour Kevin Ahn provided special music and it was just that, very special. This young man is very talented and today he shared his talents with the whole church family. It was great music carefully performed with wonderful effects.
Then Sylvia and Lillian shared pictures and thoughts about their time in Chile and their sermon provided yet another spiritual high for the day. These ladies can preach!
After the worship service was over Keanna and I met up with Steve and Nikki and smiling baby Kallie. We enjoyed our pasta, salad and great family conversation. Yet another very bright spot in the day for all of us. Later as I drove home Lois called to let me know how angry she was with me, why? because when I was down emotionally last night I had not called her to talk. The funny thing is several times I felt led to call her but each time I talked myself out of it thinking that it was too late in the evening, I saw no lights on at her house. She let me know that next time I was to call. Do you know what a blessing it is to be situated between two great neighbors. LeAnn and Ken watch over me with diet tips, walking motivation and constant friendship, Ray and Lois do the same. Can I be excused for thinking that God had a hand in placing me where I live knowing how much I would appreciate and benefit from such good people.
This afternoon I was enjoying the Donna and Shawn Want memorial christian dish and a praise team was introduced at some church, I did not catch the location. I was spellbound. Sometimes worship leading by a musical group of people is fairly uninspiring. This group, band was outstanding, interesting and their inspiring music was perfectly performed, the group was balanced, the sound was clean, harmonies were practiced and well blended. I was just glued to the screen, turned up the sound and just worshipped with them. Another very bright spot on this Sabbath day.
Bob, the church treasurer had suggested that the envelope would help me enjoy the whole weekend. The relief it carried has done just that.
A new thought has been introduced by the events of the day, let me try it on you and see what you think. For three or more years I dedicated myself along with Nan to caring for her and attempting to save her life. We endeavered to discover some joy in every day as we went along. I had a clear cut purpose for living, to be Nan's rock, thats how she put it. As you know I've been wrestling with finding the drive deep within me to even try to dump the weight, to find a zest for living again. Here's my new thought, still forming. OK, I lived and breathed caring for Nan day and night and I did well with it, we all know that. Maybe its time for me to take on a new project, to try to save Tim's life now, to enhance it, care for it, restore it. I know if Nan were here she would endorse that new direction. Do you think its possible to redirect thinking, energies, drive?
To say I'm grateful this evening is understatement, I'm thrilled and excited about facing the next day. Thank you for your help, for God's blessing.
love to all,

tim

What can I say.

Dear Family and Friends,
Finally this horrid week is over, oh yes there have been bright spots, holding Kallie and catching her smile, observing Keanna doing tumbling, being spotted and then getting kisses blown my way, having lunch with Nikki, talking to Art and Jerry on the phone, riding in Lois and Rays convertible. But the week was hot outside and emotionally draining on the inside. Day after day with bills from doctors, hospitals, labs but no income checks. Waiting for the Lord to help with the house payment, turning over every possible way to raise funds and sitting here tonight with $200 toward a $2,200 house payment. One wonders was is the use of going through the motions only to be owed the money it seems indefinitely. Promises, next Tuesday, soon, any day now. It troubles me that a issue as unimportant as money should bring me to my wits end, am I really this shallow? Its just money. Will this market ever turn around? Will there be a day when the orders are more than I can handle and Steve and I will have to hire help? In 2003 we did just under 3,000 reports for the year, this year I've logged in 212 so far. Its no wonder that funds are so tight, there are not many funds to be had.
This evening I felt the walls just pressing in, here is a holiday and I've got no plans, minimal work to complete and just about no one to talk to anymore. So I drove over to the Boardwalk, a local eating place next to the marina. I asked for a table outside by the water and the evening was cool with a breeze. I discovered to my delight that the new owners are people Nan and I knew and who owned a place in Brentwood several years ago. We ate there often and enjoyed getting to know the husband and wife team. So this evening first the wife came by and talked for a bit and then the husband came by as well. Since Brentwood they have owned a place in Alaska, Vegas and Manteca. They are doing a great job here locally and the place was jammed with patrons. In the conversation she mentioned that they had Gardenburgers. They did a great job of preparing one for me and with a house salad I ate very well.
Last weekend was so special, on Sabbath I woke to spend the day with Timothy, Keanna, Kallie, Marilyn, Sylvia, Jason and Jo and Nikki. Talk about a great time, a time of warm family connections. I know those can't happen all the time and tomorrow I'll get to take Keanna to Sabbath School, then have lunch with Nikki and the girls in Tracy. That will help a lot with the blues.
Art was a really good friend tonight and reminded me of some decent things I've done in my lifetime, especially my care for Nan. I had almost forgotten that in that portion of our life I did well. I'll always remember Steve Ahn's kind words, they made a huge impression on me. But in all fairness I've got to say when you are there in the situation you don't really consider doing anything but helping in every way you can, why would you leave, run, hide when someone who has committed her life to you and your well being is in trouble. It never crossed my mind to not help. It is a tribute to the power of Nan's love, she just knew I would do, we would do everything we could to save her life, to ease her pain, to calm her fears and together we did. Now my life seems so worthless, I just wander around aimlessly without a cause. She was worth fighting for.
Sometimes I share these things I am going through even though it would be much easier to just quit blogging and cut off any contact but I do share them in the hope that my honesty might help someone else come to grips with their feelings too. Might provide a reality check that not all is well with those we meet, that they might be in the inner struggle of their life and we need to be aware of that.
I'm saddened that at the moment I don't even care about losing weight, its seems like such an impossible dream, I read the Life Raft (GIST) daily Internet reporting and learn of people who are winning, others who are searching for the next treatment, others who are wrestling with growing tumors and diminishing hopes and it all comes back, the struggle to find a cure, a respite, a break and then defeat. Where God is in all of this I'm not sure. When things go well people claim God helped, when they go bad people of faith say God knows best. How this all works I don't have a clue.
Yet today when I arrived home from a 300 mile trip to Marysville to see a house I thanked God for a safe and comfortable trip, for a chance to make $450 and then I opened the mailbox to find another day without money, I know God knows about the house payment, never missed one before in my life so how does this all work out? What do I say when there is no money for the house payment? Or is God not into such things? The constant phone calls for bills, the lack of phone calls with orders, its all so different. So depressing....
I'm glad its Sabbath, for a few hours I'll attempt to leave the financial worries to fend for themselves and just rest in His love. Ken has already called to confirm our little health walk at 6:30 in the morning. Its about the only really right thing I do these days and I'm not willing to let it slide.
Good night my friends and family,
love

tim

A busy day, more tragedy on our block

Dear Friends and Family,
As I write this evening less than a block away a husband and wife are quickly adjusting to terrible news. This week the wife fell and when they took x rays they discovered she has stage 4 cancer in several places. She and her husband who was to have knee replacement or hip replacement tomorrow are having a very tough time coping with the terrible news. Patty, who lost her husband a year ago, and I will do what we can if they allow us to assist. Neither of us are blown away by such news as we've had to face and cope with it extensively, we can help if we are allowed. Our hearts just go out to them tonight. She starts chemo tomorrow.
This morning Nikki did a run through of where Keanna gets dropped off for school. I was prepared and went on to Oakley for an inspection, then came home and wrote the report, emailed it out and picked up the check this evening for the fee. That will help with the house payment. I have been busy writing on another appraisal as well and tomorrow I head out to Marysville for that FHA reverse mortgage inspection. Today's mail was a bust, nothing but bills, yuck.
It was about 106 today but by seeing the house early this morning the heat had no effect on me. My AC systems worked perfectly only coming on when they were needed to hold things down to 80. This evening after picking up the check in Oakley I decided on some salad and a personal deep dish pizza from UNO's in Antioch. I like the one that has tomato, feta cheese, broccoli and spinach. I'd like to think its sort of good for me.
Jason called this evening from Placerville where he and Josh had driven to buy ice. He is with the senior class, about 60 kids, doing a survival camp at Leoni Meadows. He was in good spirits and is enjoying himself. He said be brought lots of creature comforts along. He has done this trip many years and has learned the tricks of survival. He mentioned that Timothy had a 102 fever last night and is getting lots of teeth all at once, ouch!
Well I'm heading to bed now. God is in control!

love

tim

Hanging on to hope

Dear Family and Friends,
7:40 and I'm writing early this evening. For those of you who live in other parts of the country today was a more typical summer day for California, over 100 degrees, little wind and it felt hot.
Ken and I walked at 6:30 before the heat could find us and solved the few remaining problems of the world and discussed the extreme complexities of the other gender, mainly women. While there is much to take note of about that other gender there remains much that is not understood! To say the least. My world is less complex as Marilyn has taken the van and gone to Sacramento to see family, friends and others! The house seems strangely quiet, not that Marilyn ever makes noise, she does not other than turn pages in whatever book she happens to be reading at the moment and to tell Lady to stop scratching. Yet being alone is a different experience, not bad, just different. The ACs are cranking to keep things down to 80 and I've just finished setting up an order that just came in through email. It is a rush FHA, pays up front COD and is located nearby in Oakley. That means $400 toward a house payment! Unfortunately the mail person brought only medical bills, no checks today. I worked in the office this morning, then drove to Livermore to do a FHA purchase of a very nice little townhome in a new complex. When I say nice I mean top drawer everything, high ceilings, travertine floors along with wool Berber carpeting, wood cased windows, granite and stainless steel kitchen, solid wood doors inside and out, sunken spotlights, fireplace / gas furnace that turns on with a switch, solid wood around the fireplace, high quality bathroom fixtures. This little dream was to sell for $669,000 and then the market fell. It is now in contract for just $445,000 and the builder is delighted to have a buyer. How times have changed and there are NO signs of a turnaround yet. Were it not for FHA financing nothing would be happening right now. Thank God that I happened to become FHA approved 12 years ago, it helps now. After completing that appraisal I was very hungry so I located a Subway and had the Gardenburger on wheat 6 inch. Nice meal and I think reasonable for health. Then home to pick up the motorhome and drive it to Brentwood to visit a a smog shop. Of course the fee is higher for a motorhome, $99 plus certificate. I begged and he dropped it $10. Then I endured a very hot motorhome which had to be running with the engine cover open while the test progressed. It passed and by 5 pm I was on my way home. By the time I reached home the new order had come in so I've set that up, have an appointment for tomorrow, have it fully researched.
Now I'm slowing down, my eyes are very tired and dry, I feel worn out. When I am facing high financial stakes it effects me with a limited depression that seems to hit inside my chest. I am still functioning fine but have little desire to accomplish anything. It takes some effort to move forward with doing what needs to be done. The long term effects of never knowing where the next dollar is coming from, from daily calls from lenders, from opening mail that cannot have an immediate response money wise, the long term effects are pretty challenging to deal with. I'm urged by friends to hold on and allow God to lend His helping hand, I'm definitely doing that but I've got to say never knowing what is going to happen next gets real old. I feel like my word, my promises to these lenders means little. So far no lender has been denied payment but often the payment has to be delayed or is made the last minute instead of up front like it should be. I'm not really feeling like a victim or anything like that, this is my reality right now and I'm in it and intend to keep at it until things get better.
Some things just have to be put off, like shots for the dogs, new walking shoes, joining the gym, all of these are things my first impression is to just go do but then I hesitate and realize that I could wait a bit, they are not vitally important right now. House payment is vital, health care is vital, car payment is vital, PG&E fairly important too.
I think that is why special events like last evening with Bob and Carrol, the excellent dinner, the good conversation, the fun night out, special events become even more special and memorable. The same for opportunities to see, to hold the little kidos, very special, precious times. I feel a special sense of importance because with Nan's loss I get to hold them for us both, to do a little more since its just me now. Hope I am making sense. At times I wrestle with holding onto my sanity, with keeping the flame of hope alive in my heart.
So tomorrow I'll work nearby and then on Friday I'll drive to Marysville to do that appraisal. And I'm thankful for every job that comes along.
I hope your week is going well. Roger and Carol are having much needed rain in N. Carolina, two blessed days of it and they are very glad. May they have more!
So good night my friends, my family, I love you all

Tim

Just back from Jackson

Dear Family and Friends,
We are just back from Jackson where we had a wonderful time, a great meal courtesy of Bob and Carrol and enjoyed celebrating their 52Nd anniversary. Bob drove us up in their Odyssey and made the trip a joy, smooth driving, knows all the back roads. We ate at a place that is the steak house connected with the Indian Casino located just above Jackson. It is a beautiful place with top notch facilities and I feel in love with their RV parking, holds a 100 units, has hookups, grassy lawns at each site, showers, pool and clubhouse. Very impressive.
Earlier today Marilyn helped Nikki with Kallie who is transitioning from being with mom all the time to next week when she will be with a sitter and Steve on different days of the week. Once again Marilyn came through being her helpful self. I worked the best I could but really had sort of a bum day. I woke to discover that the business account was slightly overdrawn, just too many automatic charges arrived at the same time. I waited for hours for the mail to come in hopes that a check would be there but when that did not materialize I broke down and took some money out of the little savings and deposited it to cover things. When I got home I discovered a new order in the computer complete with an AMEX number for payment. So the day was not a total loss financially after all. I know of several appraisals that are to be paid any day and when they do they the house payment can be made. Living this close to the financial edge can get to one from time to time. Sylvia had written a tremendously helpful email this morning which was excellent and a lift at the same time.
The cardiologist's office called to let me know that the blood work results are not yet back so that appointment was put off a week, yea! I was able to get a local appraisal updated and completed today and out just before we had to leave for Lodi this afternoon.
Jason called this evening to let me know he and Jo are the proud owners of new phones. You just would not believe how old their existing phones were, it was really time. Perhaps I can find a car charger for the phone he now has which would be a big help to him. As Jason described his phone he said it has no features, no camera, no blue tooth, nothing while Jo's has more features. He wanted it that way, just a phone.
Ken called from the Giants ballpark to suggest we walk at 6:30 in the morning. He is going to have a short night tonight between getting home and then up early to walk. What a guy!
It was a very welcome break to be included in Bob and Carrol's celebration this evening. The food was very very good and the service was perfect. You might ask, what does a vege eat at a steak house? Sides, blessed sides. Perfectly baked potato, huge sprig of broccoli and a small bowl of baked mac and cheese. So I moved the mac and cheese to the top of the potato and vege, excellent meal. Then we had some fruit, raspberries to be more specific, oh and with a bit of cheese cake which was perfect. What a feast we had, its fun to be on this diet!

So friends and family, good night to each of you.

love

tim

Good news for Irene

Dear Friends, GISTers and Family,
Irene called this evening and shared what is happening right now in her life. A week ago she was waiting for a clinical trial to slowly decide if she would be given Nexavar and this evening she has her first bottle of Nexavar in hand. In the past week she has consulted with a GIST specialist in Portland, Dr. Heinrick and is working with an oncologist at Kaiser who sensing that time is very important when tumors are on the move helped her get the Nexavar off label immediately. She is also considering a brief round of radiation to see if some relief is possible from the tumor generated pain. Once again she had to make decisions with nearly everyone in the medical community having a slightly different take on things. Some wanted her to wait for 4 weeks after the radiation before starting the Nexavar while others thought she could do both at the same time. Irene has felt led to begin both as soon as possible. Her faith is strong, her spirits are good and she is looking forward to doing what is possible to slow or reduce the tumor threat. Another very meaningful thing is Kaiser is paying for the Nexavar even though its use is off label. That is very big news and encouraging for others to follow. Blue Cross will not pay for any off label use of a medicine leaving it for the patient to find the funds to cover the $5,000 + a month. So Irene is feeling the blessings of God this evening.
Meanwhile I've worked close to home today, clearing out appraisals that need to be completed, doing conditions and fixing things in reports. I started off the day by discovering that the report I wrote on Thursday was wiped out by the one I wrote on Friday and since I had to fix a couple things in the Thursday report I had to reenter it word by word today and recreate it in the computer. While not fun it is done now, accidents do happen and I caused this one. Its been two days without money which is sort of hard to take but two orders did come in today which was very good news.
Marilyn twisted my arm and persuaded me to add a DVR to the cable TV system. So we went to town today and picked it up, picked up meds at Longs and then a few groceries. Even though we went to the cheap store it seems they sure cost a lot.
This evening Lois and Ray invited us to join them for dinner at a little to go place in Brentwood. My little burrito with rice and beans was very good. Then when we came home they invited us to the back deck for coffee and cake. We ended up enjoying the cool breezes off the lake and joking around with them. We got to ride in their vintage BMW convertible, talk about a bad hair day! The whole evening was fun and a nice change from sitting at the computer all day.
Now its bed time. Ken, drill sergeant, says we walk at 6:30 in the morning so the alarm comes early.
I am hourly deciding to live with hope in spite of some pretty hefty financial challenges ahead. Why not move forward and try, rather than give up and wilt under the pressure.
I am so thankful to have spent the weekend with the family. How I enjoy my kids and their kids. It is like a huge present everytime I get to see them, a spot of joy and peace, a reality check on life as to whats really important, not stuff, not power and success, its people caring about people. I also discovered more about Sylvia, her gentle voice, her endless patience shown as she was teaching a little one to use chop sticks, her gentle touch when holding the babies. God has gifted her with some very special abilities which she shares easily and naturally. She was a wonderful addition to the weekend.
Soon Marilyn is going to head to Sacramento to see her mother in law who has suffered an injury, to see her sister and her friends. Tomorrow we drive to Bob and Carrol's house, join them as we all drive up to the foothills for dinner, to celebrate their 52 wedding anniversary. What fun, what a blessing that Carrol is experiencing respite from the big C. We will enjoy our evening.
So my friends, fellow GISTers, family, life moves forward and gradually picks up steam.

Sending love to all,

Tim

Home again after a delightful time with Timothy & parents of course

Dear Family and Friends,

We drove in about 8 this evening after an uneventful trip home up 880 to Mission and then to 680, 84 and 580 to Vasco Road. The motorhome did its thing perfectly the entire trip. I'm primarily relying on photos this evening to tell my story as I need to get some rest. Drill sergeant Ken says we walk at 6:30 in the morning and I need the exercise. The big event tomorrow is a visit to the Cardiologist, whoopee!

Our time at MBA with Timothy, Jason and Jo was magical and to have Nikki, Keanna and Kallie come on Sabbath created a wonderful time with family, then blend in the presence of our friends Marilyn and Sylvia and it was perfect. You all know how precious moments with the family can be and with Nan gone these moments mean even more to me now as I feel like I need to experience them and participate in them for the both of us. I want these little ones to know that they are loved by more than their parents, that they are loved by the whole family and friends group. That they are important and that we are proud of them, of Kallies smiles, of Timothy's first steps, of Keanna's excitement for life and her non stop fun.

This morning we went to a place known well by Jason and Jo and it turned out to be really a hit. The service was supportive, the food was tasty and freshly created, a great experience. After we completed breakfast Sylvia headed up Highway 1 for beach exploring and we went back to the house. I ended up napping, doing a little big of baby feeding, of baby sitting and a lot of just watching him in action.

Yesterday I got to hold Kallie and feed her a bottle, to observe how strong she is becoming and to see her dig her little feet into the sand, that was so cute and is in one of the pictures I took.

The week ahead is proving to be one of the most challenging financially in the past year. Citi card has agreed to accept a payment of $1,439 tomorrow and follow up with payments of $400 a month for the next 12 months. By entering into this agreement I avoid 29% interest, in fact they will charge no interest for the next 12 months. However I have just that amount collected for the house payment which was due on the 1st. So once again I have to made decisions, choices with no easy answers. I can only hope, pray that significant monies will come in in the next few days and I'm confident that this too will work out.

So enjoy the pictures and a special thanks to all involved this weekend for making our time together so very special. It fills my heart with hope and meaning.

love

tim

A Sabbath to remember

Dear Family and Friends,

This has been one of those rare days a pappa can only dream about. After a short night in the motorhome with a couple interruptions I rose this morning to take the walk with the dogs and then shower. Jason and Jo provided an excellent breakfast and then we were off to Sabbath School. Timothy attends an excellent Sabbath School with lots of activities, music, stuffed animals and love. Its a great program produced by an excellent team.

At around 1 pm both Sylvia and Nikki arrived. We had a great lunch and after a while we migrated to the beach where everyone had a great time. Even the sun peeked through for awhile. To see Keanna doing a dive into the sand and Kallie digging her little feet into the sand, to see Timothy roaming around working with his beach toys.

Finally the cool air got to us all and we headed back up the hill to the house where we talked, looked at travel photos and watched the kids play even more. Now Marilyn and I are in the motorhome, I am blogging and she is reading. The TV is playing a Reese Whitherspoon movie and the dogs are resting after a big day for them.

Jason is so excited about his new career teaching English and already has stories of his young people. He loves helping kids get ready for life and Jo loves working with her little people as well. The weather has been pretty good today, cool, foggy and limited sunshine. In spite of a world where things for the most part are challenging a weekend like this is a great chance to recharge emotional and spiritual batteries. Its just fun to see the whole family together under one roof, if only Steve could have been here then we would have been complete.

I'll have some photos tomorrow night, can't download them tonight.

Lets remember to keep Irene in our thoughts and prayers as she faces some tough decisions right away. She is very precious to me and I know many of you know her as well. Oh that this horrible disease would just be beaten.

Good night to each and all,

love

tim

At Jason and Jo's home

Dear Family and Friends,

We are finally here at MBA. We've enjoyed the trip down very much and it was nice as the temperature cooled. We finally got away after 4 pm. I was preparing my first REO appraisal and every step required a bit of a learning curve. Finally it all came together and the report was ready. Even sending it required learning something new. I had to log in to the special web site, Appraisal Port and download the report PDF through their page. I'll find out on Monday if it worked but for now I think its done.

It is amazing how long it takes to load everything we need in the motorhome. It takes a list to get everything on board. There is something about driving down to MBA that is so special. First off it only takes about two hours so the fuel used is reasonable, secondly as one nears the ocean fog often is high overhead offering a cooling break from the summer heat of the valley, thirdly family lives here, Jason, Jo and Timothy and that of course is the most special thing of all.

As we turned from Highway 101 onto 129 the fog loomed ahead and the AC suddenly seemed too cold, the dogs shivered and Marilyn noticed that the heat was no longer beating in the side window. By the time we reached Watsonville the temperature was down to the 60s. Our trip was uneventful other than the fan in the dash of the motorhome failed for a few miles. Then suddenly it was working again. We were glad it continued to work the remainder of the trip.

We are looking forward to tomorrow, Timothy at Sabbath School, worship service in the big church and lunch afterwards. Sylvia is driving down tomorrow afternoon to enjoy some time with Timothy and our family. Nikki and the girls are considering coming as well. What great fun.

Starr and Lady have been so excited ever since the motorhome stopped in the driveway and when I allowed them to go to the coach this afternoon they were delighted. Starr never settled down the entire trip but Lady just slept at Marilyn's feet. Now they are making it obvious that they think its time to go to bed. Marilyn gets the bedroom while I get the front pullout bed and the dogs, does this sound fair, big bed should get the dogs but Marilyn is having none of it. So it will be me and the dogs and the breathing machine.

This week has proved to be very interesting with some work coming in, some travel accomplished and some funds in the mail box. We've enjoyed spending time with Lois, last night I got to hold Kallie and see Keanna in action for a few minutes, I've switched the business line to Vonage having become very tired of AT&T not keeping their word. the week has been like that, ups and downs, good and bad.

To me the most difficult moment was hearing from Irene that her GIST tumor has grown a lot in the last two months. I know exactly the thoughts and concerns that go through ones mind when faced with run away tumors. I just keep praying that God will be very active in her body and that the radiation will give her the relief she needs right now.

And so life goes, challenges, moments of joy, moments of meaning and a lot of just plain hard work. At this moment I'm thankful that The Sabbath has arrived and all the cares of this life can be left behind for a bit.

Love to all,

tim

Irene needs our prayers!

Dear Family and Friends,
As I write this evening the network is not working on my desktop computer so I'm on the little laptop writing these words.
Lois came over today and gave each of the dogs a bath so they could go on the trip clean and pure. Thank you Lois for your loving concern for Starr and Lady. They both look so cute tonight.
I had an appraisal appointment this afternoon in Oakland. What a beautiful home and a very sweet lady. Thats the fun side of this business, meeting the great people and seeing all the good things they have done to their homes. The traffic really moved well coming home until I hit Pittsburg where everything came to a standstill, it took nearly another hour to get to Brentwood where I caught up with Kallie, Nikki and Keanna at tumbling. They are so precious.
Then I remembered I was supposed to pick up a cancer patient who lives in Discovery Bay but enjoys coming to the grief recovery group. So I headed to Discovery Bay, picked Bob up and drove back to the group meeting place. The room was filled with people, the largest gathering yet for the group. It was a very moving evening with many people sharing, learning and offering support to others in the group.
When I got home Lois called to tell me the internet was not working. There is something wrong with the 10/100 switch which feeds the network to the various computers around the house. While I've faced this before I am never sure what I did last time to fix it.
This morning when we drove to the motorhome to bring it home the batteries were totally dead. We ended up jumping the generator, got it running and then that provided enough power to start the engine of the motorhome. Now its in the driveway with a cord charging the batteries. Its been a couple months since I used the coach and somehow the batteries were depleted.
In the morning I'll write a couple reports, then we'll load up the motorhome and head down in the afternoon to MBA and cooler weather. The dogs know something is up and are very excited already. Actually so am I.
This morning i received a very touching email from Irene. Her latest scan revealed that a tumor has grown a lot since June. The tumor is causing her great pain and suffering and a decision has been made to use radiation to try to reduce its size. I know from experience that radiation can help a GIST tumor as it caused one of Nan's tumors to be reduced by half and gave her a lot of relief from pain. Irene needs our prayers now as she faces this new challenge in her life. GIST is a horrible enemy but God is still in control.

How we need each other in this old world.

love

Tim

Working for a change, feels good

Dear Family and Friends,
Its been a long day and rewarding too. Ken and I walked this morning, at this point I've put in 13, 354 steps today and I feel every one of them. Blood sugar numbers were normal, blood pressure was normal. Sylvia's pedometer certainly gives one something to work with, thanks!

Comcast techs came this morning and rewired a bit in at attempt to give us more reliable service. So far so good today. Marilyn and Nikki had lunch with the girls and did some shopping. I hit the road at about noon, caught a burrito from Taco Bell in Stockton and then drove to Eldorado Hills which is on 50 toward Placerville. A key had been hidden and a check left for me. The home was beautiful and well maintained, comps were nearby. Then I headed down the hill to Stockton but encountered a bit of traffic which caused me to arrive late to the Stockton appointment. I enjoyed seeing the home, shot the comps and then called Marilyn to see if she wanted to go to Brentwood with me to pick up my meds and to find food. When I got home Lois was visiting so we all went to Subway for sandwiches and I picked up my stack of meds at Longs, my co pay was just $80 this evening. Now I'm about to fall asleep. Its been a long day, the car has 550 miles so far on this tank of fuel.
I have a question for my loyal and brilliant readers. How does one get a pit out of a Nectarine without destroying the fruit in the process? Are there any special secrets? I just love the taste and texture but I'm a mess by the time I get the pit out.
Enough funds have come in so I can pay part of the house payment tomorrow. This is good news in a month that has seen $1,100 in car repairs, data charges, E&O renewal, motorhome license renewal, plus awhole lot of smaller bills for garbage, phones, cable and Internet, you know the numbers. I am so thankful as I sit here tonight, thankful that God has been very active in His help with some orders, some checks, some survival.
Tomorrow afternoon I go to Oakland to see a property, in the morning I will sit and write up reports.
Marilyn and I are still enjoying tomatoes and peaches from Joyce and Glen's garden and yard. So good, totally beyond anything one can buy in the stores. And of course I am still enjoying eating the bread I bake, Its pretty much what I eat bread wise now.
Life continues to get better, more hopeful and positive. 60 is OK so far. Just have a very hard time believing it is true.
Jerry, my brother, told me it was not so bad and he has certainly demonstrated that retiring and being older can still not keep you from enjoying life. I think he and Donna are busier than ever before and hes lost weight, is busy in his garden, walks miles every day and I'm so proud to call him my brother.
My sister Sibyl is home from the hospital and is doing better too, is now able to get up on her feet a bit and is in such positive spirits.
love to all

Tim

A whole lot of driving today

Dear Friends and Family,
We are back finally from a trip to Windsor that lasted much longer than we expected. I walked solo this morning and then worked in the office completing reports and taking care of business. At about 1:45 we Marilyn decided to join me for the trip to Windsor to conduct a driveby appraisal of a property that is about to be foreclosed. The traffic was very bad as we neared Santa Rosa and we finally came on the culprit, a brand new Toyota Prius stopped dead in the fast lane with a frantic man inside. We left him to enjoy the joys of high mileage and drove on only to discover that the GPS took us to the wrong town so after doing a bit of back tracking we finally arrived at the house, shot it and the comps and then headed home again. While we expected bad traffic near Santa Rosa non materialized and our trip home was uneventful. I managed to forget to pick up my meds at Longs in Brentwood so tonight and tomorrow morning I am out of fish oil.
Tomorrow I drive to Eldorado Hills for a 2 pm appointment and then back to Stockton for a 4:30 appointment. I am thankful for the work and for the checks that arrived in today's mail. They will go a ways toward the house payment.
Home, a place like none other, how good it was to turn the corner and see home in the distance, yes the lawn needs mowing and the trim desperately need paint but its home and two very anxious little dogs were at the door to greet us.
Marilyn and I have talked a lot about our lives today, she and Walter and me and Nan. Both of us have experienced lots of ups and downs, of hard times, of terrible mistakes made but we have also the salve of knowing we had something rare, the love of precious people, Walt and Nan.

Just living is a huge challenge, and living well is an even larger adventure. Are you enjoying your lives? Ever wonder what comes next? I sure do.

Sending huge arm fulls of love to each and every one of you.

love

tim

IRS talks go well

Dear Friends and Family,
I'm so glad I know you and have you in my life. It helps to fill my life with more meaning and purpose.
Today some orders came in, take a peek at where they are located. El Dorado Hills above Sacramento, Windsor above Santa Rosa, Oakland, Stockton, Pittsburg. And all in a rush of course. Am I complaining, forgive me, no I'm not complaining, this is how my God is working, I see Him urging people to order from Discovery Appraisal and wondering why as they are doing it, as I look forward I see a busy company again and the chance to work myself out of debt and into a savings account, getting ahead enough so I too can go on a mission trip and help people. I see myself as a slim 60 year old in good health reaching out to assist people, doing good work and enjoying success. After all I'm a child of the King and I think the King would like his children to do well and do their best.
This evening Marilyn and I headed out to Tracy after the phones stopped for the day and used one of the gift cards that were shared by kind people for the recent birthday. The food was perfect, the salad fresh and tasty.
This morning the Comcast cable guy came and looked over our systems. His conclusion is that the copper cable I installed 20 years ago cannot handle the newer digital signals so we need some new cables run. He was a real gentleman and Starr loved him after trying to eat him at the front door. On Wednesday he will come back and run the cable which should solve a year old problem of losing some of the lower and most used channels, 2 through 7.
Marilyn was kind enough to watch for the postman today because I expected two checks in the mail. Sure enough when he arrived Marilyn spotted him, alerted me, the money was there, I made a deposit and got ahead of the checks and charges that were coming in.
This afternoon I finally screwed up enough courage to dial IRS and after about 30 minutes a very helpful lady talked with me. She extended the date when we need to work out an agreement for 30 days which should allow for Ken to file the 2007 year, for me to find $2,000 to cover 941 payments that are due and then to work out an agreement for what I owe in total. It was a very worthwhile exchange and with total kindness and courtesy.
There are so many reasons to be grateful and thankful in both my business life and personal life.
Gradually life is starting to resemble some order and reason again. Nan was such a powerful and talented woman who carried more than her share of duties in our life together. With her at rest I am learning to handle some of the many things she did so well. In general I think she would be pleased with my progress. Yet she would certainly have advice and counsel for me. God gifted me with her for so many wonderful and exciting years and I just am totally thrilled that I was the one that got to enjoy living with her.
For those of you who have lost a spouse you will know personally what I mean when I say, living without them is not something one could ever expect or prepare for. Its like having a beautiful vase, having it smashed and then trying to pick up the pieces and go on. It is happening but it is not easy or pleasant.
So I thank God for Marilyn being here, she is so easy to talk to and very helpful with practical things, the family loves her and I know she enjoys being here on vacation but misses her special family very much too. Once again I am on the receiving end of an act of love, of kindness and I'm not worthy but I'm thankful just the same.

love to all,

Tim

Marilyn returns, a new week begins

Good evening,

10:40 and all is quiet and cool this evening. Ken and I walked this morning and then I made a bowl of steel cut oats, had a nectarine and started to clear my desk. Paper piles up so fast. At 2 I had an inspection in Oakley which is a nearby town and what fun the people were during the visit. Then I checked out the new Costco store in Antioch. Wow, they've done nice work there making it even easier to spend large amounts of money. After a berry sundae I drove back home to begin working up the report for the property just seen. It is done now. Marilyn came home in the late afternoon with glowing reports of her many fun activities which included visits to the State Fair, a nearby casino for a buffet and a big win on the nickle machine. She really enjoyed time spent with her friend Diane.

Tomorrow I have an appointment to call the IRS but since we are not quite done with the 2007 tax year Ken is suggesting I seek a little more time so I will try to make that point.

Nan always kept the pets up to date on their shots, flea control and grooming. I finally broke down today and applied Front Line plus to each of the girls in hopes we will find better flea control and less scratching on their part. This evening our little neighbor dog is barking and barking. Lois and Ray left for a three day trip to spend time with their son near Sacramento and their little dog Pooch is not happy. He has water, food and a safe place to be but he does not like the arrangements and is still barking at 10:45. I'm not sure how to help him and this is not the first time he has been left on his own. Hope he settles down during the night. I want to help him but don't know what to do.

Those with GIST are always on my heart, I read about the experiences of GISTers every day in the Life Raft emails. Tonight our friend Irene Wing needs our prayers and best thoughts. Just 8 months after a recent surgery she has new tumors growing and now they are causing her severe pain and suffering. She is actively pursuing medical help through Kaiser and GIST specialists located in Portland. I know she would appreciate knowing that we are all including her and Ron in our prayers. GIST is a terrible enemy that so many face. Oh that a cure could be found or a better stop gap medical breakthrough could take place. Right now its surgery, then Gleevec, then Sutent and then one is left with many options, trials and it becomes a guessing process, to find what is best. Irene is trying to obtain nexavar and it looks good that should might be able to use it in an off label manner instead of having to wait through all the steps to prepare for a trial. Valuable time can be lost and with GIST days and weeks are important. Haste is vital. Not all oncologists know that but its true.

I am thankful tonight for Nikki and Steve, Jason and Jo and the three precious little wonders, Keanna, Kallie and Timothy. Life beams when they are near. I deeply appreciate the loving attention and care I receive from my family. Its not a given, not all families know how to love in tangible ways like mine does and I think them for it.

So good night my friend, how can I help you?

love

tim

v

Exciting 24 hours

Dear Family and Friends,

How exciting to spend time with family. Keanna came for a sleep over last night, didn't get up until 7:30 this morning, was a perfect angel and at around 10 I returned her to her parents. Then I pointed the VW toward MBA and a little over 2 hours later arrived. The house was quiet as they were still at church so I found the recliner and fell asleep. You see this morning when I showered I had a itching reaction which sometimes happens and to head it off I took a benedryl (sp). It held off making me sleepy until I arrived in the cool overcast beachfront weather. I watched over Timothy while Jason and Jo went to the all school potluck at the caf. Timothy and I both had more napping. Then we headed to the beach as the entire student body was there creating sand castles and bible stories in sand. These kids go all out. Timothy enjoyed playing in the sand but started to eat it. We headed back up to the house and Timothy continued to drip sand the rest of the afternoon. I've included a few photos of Mr Timothy and parents. Jason's cottage cheese loaf was perfect and the afternoon watching Timothy in action was just great. I got to hold him, watch him scurry around walking behind his little walker. He is quite the little dude. As the evening approached I decided to head home, not sure how I was going to do sleepy wise but made it home fine. I stopped and filled in Livermore and discovered that on this trip today I got almost 46 mpg. That felt great so the entire trip only cost about $20, not bad for a great day with the "man".

While on the trip down I made a very nice discovery. To save miles I always turn off at airway blvd in Livermore and use 84 which is a short cut between Livermore and Sunol Grade. For the past year crews have been creating a new straight road where previously it had been a bunch of very narrow and curvy switchbacks. Today the new road was open. Just one straight shot and with a decent speed limit. Wow it was nice and it will be even nicer this coming weekend when I take the motorhome down. I like discovering new things that make life a tiny bit easier. For example ever since the bug required the AC, fuse box and new switch repairs it has been running much quieter and doing an excellent job of cooling the hot air. But at the same time they put that new cabin air filter in and that has made a drastic change in the air flow too. Now I can often just bring outside air in without the AC on at all and its cool enough. Funny how a few minor changes can make such a huge adjustment in the quality of life, I think of examples, applesauce from Loren and Emily, canned fruit and jam from Joyce Connor, automatic cat box from Pam, GPS from Nan for Christmas a year ago, new camera replacing my old one that my kids laughed at, the new chip that Ray and Lois gave me for my birthday, gift cards for Olive Garden, Ken walking nearly every morning, Steve taking me golfing, a new blood sugar meter which really works and on it goes. What a difference these and many others things can mean. One of the nicest gifts I ever received was a seat cushion that had a blower built in to move air under and behind you in the seat of the car. But due to my weight i wore it out.

Today Jason and Jo gave me my birthday present, a framed photo of Timothy with his arms in the air, it is so cute and Nikki and STeve gave me a photo with a cute frame of Keanna and Kallie. Now you want to talk perfect gifts, those are it.

Life seems to be making more sense lately, I have huge obstacles yet to confront and the future of my profession is somewhat up in the air yet I am thankful for where I'm at, for blessings, for family and for special friends like Marilyn who helps take care of me this month. That is if I ever get her back from the STate Fair!

So I send my love to each and every one of you.

Tim

This has been a hot week

Dear Family and Friends,
When Jason told me this morning that their highest temperature for the past two weeks was around 70 I could not believe it. He said they have not seen the sun, constant fog. Meanwhile we bake here in the valley, I mean really bake. Just getting in and out of the car several times while I did errands, bought cat food, Frontline plus, a few groceries, well it was hot every time. Fortunately since the bug was repaired the AC works wonderfully, the car runs cool and the AC blows like Alaska.
This evening as I write Keanna is sleeping in her room upstairs. Nikki brought her by around 6 and then went to her scrapbooking session. Keanna and I had a good time watching her movies, eating the pasta I prepared and entertaining Lois who came over to see her. Lois was so kind and brought her bubble solution and a cute little container holding M&Ms.
I did not walk this morning. Instead I decided it was time to settle down and get my part of the tax data completed and to Ken. I finished up around noon but Ken could not work on the taxes today. I logged orders, emailed some work out, worked more on getting E&O insurance renewed for a decent price. We are now up to over $800 for the policy for a year.
My kitties had run out of food and were starting to complain so I headed out to get new food. The kind I usually buy was not available at the Pet Food Express where prices are lower. She told me that Ecanumba is no longer made by the same company and recommended I switch to a different brand. She gave me a two week supply to see if the kitties would like it and had me go to another store to buy a small amount of the prior food so the switch would not be so drastic. I also returned two cable boxes that I have never used in the entire year I've had them. I also spoke to the Comcast rep about getting my service to work better. Interestingly enough when I got home my cable had been shut off completely. When I called it became obvious that the person at the desk did something wrong, in a few minutes my 100 channels were back on again.
I also went by the Union Cemetery District where Nan was laid to rest. Nikki has expressed concern that I would let time pass and not secure the grave site adjacent to Nan. I've been reluctant to try since the cost is over $2,000. The lady was so nice today and allowed me to place a hold on the adjacent grave site for the next 90 days and they will call if anyone attempts to purchase that site and give the family first rights to purchase. That was such a relief to not have to come up with the money right now when things are growing increasingly tight.
I spent some time this afternoon in the kitchen, made a new loaf of bread which turned out great, unloaded the dishwasher and reloaded it, deposited the check that came in today's mail and purchased a new tank of diesel so I'm good for the next week or more of travel.
I won't be able to take Keanna to Sabbath School tomorrow since she has the opportunity to travel with her family to Fresno for a birthday party for one of their friends. They try to go every year and always have a great time.
I'm considering driving down to Jason and Jo's place to spend some quality time with Mr Timothy. Its been too long since I've seen him. I could use a dose of 70 degree weather too for a change.
For all those people who brought food last Sunday I again want to say thank you. I've been eating very well from the frig, the nectarines, the peaches, the tomatoes, the chips, the veges, the fruit plates, the pies. Add that to the left overs Mary sent on Wednesday night and there has been very little reason to buy groceries. Thanks to all of you.

This being 60 is OK so far. Now if I could be 60 and 150 lbs then it would be really OK. The weight is a ongoing challenge which I've not really faced yet. I'm considering weight watchers as it has been recommended by many people I deeply respect.

It was a emotional moment at the graveside today. With all my heart I do not believe that Nan should be there, she should be on the phone to her family and friends, watching TV with Marilyn, planning a trip, spoiling the grandchildren. It is awful having her gone and no it does not get easier when you really stop to think about it. What gets easier is that you don't think about it so much or as deeply. No one can remain in a crisis forever. Not humanly possible. I miss her, I treasure her words, her ideals, her taste, her class.
There seems so much I have to leave with God and simply trust that He knows best.

love

tim

Good grief

Dear Family and Friends,

10:05 and this is the end of an interesting day. So far today I've taken 11,913 sf, emailed out several reports, worked on getting a quote of a new E&O, gave up on AT&T for the business line and signed up with Vonage at a much less expensive rate. I bid Marilyn farewell as she left for Sacramento to see her friend and sister, attend the state fair and have some fun. But this evening was the high point of my day.

Nikki needed to take Keanna to our park for a school picnic play event. In spite of temperatures over 100 the event went forward. However Kallie would not have appreciated the extreme heat so Nikki asked if she could stay here in the air conditioned home with me. Well I was delighted. They arrived, Nikki quickly made dinner, Keanna was in rare form, cute as a bug and full of life. She was excited about playing with her friends in the park. After dinner Nikki and Keanna left for the park and Kallie and I had bonding time. We started in the recliner with her resting on my chest, she lifted her head and looked around, smiled and eventually started to cry. So I relocated where I could hold her better and fed her a bottle. What pure bliss to watch her eat, smile and wave her hands and then gradually fall asleep in my arms. So when Nikki and Keanna returned she was sleeping in her pappas arms. It was a magic moment, one I will always remember. Then it was time for them to head home and for me to head to the grief group.

Going to grief group is always a challenge, someone is in serious trouble every week but not always the same person. Tonight was no exception and there were many smiles, laughs and tears shed as we each shared our week's high and low points and discussed the changes that take place after the first year of loss. I'm learning that I will always have a special love place in my heart for Nan, filled with our lives and experiences and still at the same time I may eventually find a new place for someone else, not to replace Nan or the positive memories of her. There is no replacing Nan. But as life progresses there may be new opportunities for happiness and meaning in life.

I'm going to put a couple photos in tonight. The one of the black dog, Lady, was taken by Keanna.

Sending my love and appreciation for each of you who help fill the gaps created by loss.

love

tim

Thankful for a busy day

Dear Family and Friends,
9:10 and I'm finally home from a whirlwind day of actual appraisal work. Ken and I walked this morning and we checked the pedometer and found the 3 mile walk yields about 6,600 steps. Right now I'm at 12,501 for the entire day, not bad for a 60 year old guy who is 75 lbs over weight. Thank you Sylvia for this most intriguing device. I actually think I might be on the right path now for a lot of things. Oh the challenges are higher than ever financially. Thousands owed to the IRS and State, more thousands to credit cards, car payments late but there is hope all around.
Hope came in the form of actual appraisal work today. I left here around 9:15 and inspected a home that has sold right here on the lake, then to the golf course to inspect for a lender, to let them know that the house will probably be OK for FHA loan purposes in the near future, then a quick drive to Dublin where the home selling was outstanding, beautiful, updated, furnished perfectly, staged in such a way that the pictures are beautiful. Then after locating the comps I had lunch at Applebees and their side salad was huge. Then on to Martinez to find a house located on such a steep downslope I actually was afraid to may my way down to the tiny lawn in the back as it was three stories lower and I feared falling. I didn't fall though and was able to complete the appraisal. Then I found myself two hours early for the final inspection in El Cerritos so I drove there slowly, found a shade tree and with the breezes from the nearby bay took a much needed nap. Then I woke to shoot the comps photos and finally inspect the little home when the owner got home. Finally at 6:45 I was able to head home and with minimal traffic the trip was pretty easy. I had hoped to forward appraisal work to Jean for her assistance but its too late to do so tonight. Always tomorrow!
How different today was from recent days where nothing work wise was coming in. A new order came in today through a new service I have signed up for, Appraisal Port. Of course the work is in Windsor, above Santa Rosa but it is a job and I can use the new information I gained at the seminar I attended last week. I am thankful for a safe day, for the newly repaired bug which performed perfectly and cooled like a frig all day. This evening I had left overs which were kindly sent home from Mary's last night. they were just as good tonight as last night. Marilyn and I are both in awe of Mary's cooking.
Now its time to cash it in for the day.
Sending love to all and how I appreciated seeing so many friends on Sunday. I just keep thinking about it with a smile. How blessed I am.

love
tim

A day that ended with games

Dear Family and Friends,
Well this evening we are just back from dinner and Mexican domino's at Mary and Hilario house. We had a lovely dinner with Mary's version of cottage cheese loaf and it was absolutely wonderful. Then they cleared the table and brought out the domino's. Neither Marilyn or I are very good at games but we ended up having a tremendous time, so fun and we all took turns winning.
The day has been one of work and new orders. Today 4 orders came wafting in, great news in light of the one single order I had before. All are going to be COD and all are FHA orders too. Perhaps I can do some catch up money wise now and get the car payments taken care of. Honda was not that impressed with my responses today when they called to demand a payment. I simply told them I can't promise something I do not have but they are next on the list. Its as good as I can do.
We were able to share some of the wonderful fruit with our neighbor Patty who lost her husband a year ago with cancer and is caring full time for 5 grandchildren ranging in age from about 9 to 16. She has her hands full and is doing an excellent job with the kids. They happen to love tomatoes and Joyce brought some beautiful ones, more than I could eat fast enough so we shared a bit and they were thrilled. We also shared a couple Nectarines that George and Yvonne brought. Talk about good fruit, the peaches from Joyce's tree and the Nectarines are outstanding, I can hardly stop eating them and my blood sugar is loving the fruit, its been normal all day today, yea!
I've had such pleasant memories, flashbacks really from Sunday, of special moments with friends and family and of the time I got to spend with Steve on the golf course too. What a very special birthday this turned out to be. I've not been at peace like I am now for several months.
Marilyn treated herself to a new camera today, its pink, does amazing things and was reasonable in price.
Well its time to head to bed, Ken says we walk in the morning at 7. The pedometer Sylvia supplied is pretty amazing. By the time we completed our walk this morning I had already logged over 3,000 steps and now it reads, 10,891. For those of you who might be wondering what this is about. Current thinking for an active lifestyle of one who wants to lose weight is to take 10,000 steps per day. So on that front I'm OK. But I've not started to journal every bite I take yet and I know I need to. That is another part of moving into a new life style. Of course these delicious muffins from CostCo are not really the best basis for a diet either but as we share them with Lois and Ray they are being enjoyed very much.
Tomorrow I see properties in Discovery Bay, Dublin, Martinez and El Cerritos and then drive home. It will be a great day.
Good night my friends,

love to all

Tim

Life moves on

Good evening friends and family,
This has been a sleepy day with its high point, lunch with Nikki and Kallie. I've cleaned up my desk a bit, did some value checks for possible appraisals, made a deposit, walked 3 miles with Ken, had dinner tonight with Lois and Ray and Marilyn in Brentwood at a Mexican food place and then we went in search of pet stores where I can take Starr and Lady to get them back into a program of flea control and also a heart worm exam and meds. I am aware that I'll have to spend some money but I want to take proper care of my little girls, my buddies. Nan always took care of Frontline and heart worm meds and everything. I don't even know where the records are for the doggies. Marilyn is researching places, times and best prices for the testing and supplies.
I'm about to try the spa again, so nice to have it working and functioning again. I'm still in just a bit of afterglow from getting to see so many friends yesterday. It was so special and heart warming and I just keep thinking of my blessings, wonderful family every one of them, loving and helpful friends, just such a huge blessings and thoughtful and helpful neighbors. I certainly receive more than I give and I thank God for everyone of you.
I received an order today and have it scheduled for Wed. evening. Its a COD which is another blessing and a check did come in the mail today which helps to keep the account in the black for a change.
So good night dear friends and family members, you are a great inspiration to me.

love

tim

Celebrating 60 with family and friends!

Wow what fun we had today,
Ken and I walked this morning and my being sore really caught up with me. Then the kids called and invited us to breakfast at the Byron Inn. That was a great meal, thanks kids! It was perfect. Then we made a trip to town for last minute supplies which Marilyn so kindly took care of while I caught a nap in the car. This this afternoon it was party time.

What a huge blessing to have such friends and family. Not everyone who came is pictured. Joyce sent these photos when she returned to her home in Lodi and I wanted to share them. I didn't take any photos as I was totally busy just getting to talk to my friends.

Dave Hardesty made the mistake of coming early and was put to work on projects. He ended up fixing the spa, first time it has worked well in over 3 years and yes I got to sit in it tonight and soak out some of the aches and pains from golfing and working cleaning things up the last few days. He helped Ray with getting the bimini top put back on the paddle boat. Becky Lanza had been so kind as to sew the new top from material Ray purchased a few weeks ago. Dave helped with getting the drinks ready with ice in the chests. Soon friends arrived with all kinds of great food, salads, fruits, chips, fresh corn, fresh peaches, fresh tomato's, fresh muffins, fresh Nectarines, nuts and then a beautiful cake supplied by Nikki along with another pie, a delicious pie that tasted like strawberries, oh I could go on and on. Great food with lots of color and creativity. Reds, greens, pinks, browns, wow. Then Ray and Lois started preparing the BBQ items which included burgers and Boca burgers on whole wheat buns with all the fixings.

George and Yvonne were just in from a week at Tahoe and I was so excited that they could come, Shawn and Joyce from Lodi, many friends from Tracy, Mary from Discovery Bay Travel, our neighbors from both sides, Ray and Lois and Ken and LeAnn. Talk about being blessed, such good neighbors and friends. Keanna repeatedly sang Happy Birthday to me and every time was a heart touching experience. Once she stopped me and said we should pray for Grammy so we did, she prayed for Grammy, Noka (their Rottweiler), their two kitties. She has such a tender and sweet heart. Kallie was held by so many different friends and I think each enjoyed this very special little bundle. Nikki was superb in helping everything happen just right. Barb and Gerry arrived early and she did her usual special tough cleaning tables and organizing. I'm sure Marilyn is very tired tonight as she has shopped, worked and been on duty all day.

The cards are so cute, thoughtful and will be enjoyed over and over again. In spite of the gift prohibition a few slipped through, a beautiful candle with two wicks, several gift certificates for Olive Garden, even some cash and a really cute balloon.

There is no way I could adequately thank everyone for all they did but the net result was a very special time where I got to share the house and its setting beside the lake, where I got to see many of my friends up close and could catch up on their lives.

And there were special moments too, of health issues being faced by several with serious overtones. Many need our special prayers.

Tonight I am grateful for getting to share this day, turning 60, with people I trust, love and treasure. No one could ask for more.

love to one and all,

tim

Wow

Dear Family and Friends,
Today has held many enjoyable moments! I walked this morning after a 105 blood sugar reading, a good number. Then I quickly got ready and Marilyn and I picked up Keanna, drove to Sabbath School with an on time arrival. Kim did a great program and then we took Keanna to play for a bit before meeting Nikki, Steve and Kallie, Bob and Carrol at the Olive Garden. Bob, who is always faithful to his word, had brought coupons worth $4 off for each ticket. We all enjoyed conversation, took turns admiring the baby and rejoiced in Carrol's good health. It was a great pre birthday celebration. Then Steve surprised me with a round of golf at Bethel Island, we were the only ones there practically and we found a brisk breeze, pretty surroundings and many excuses for not hitting the ball like we intended. I fully enjoyed just having the time with Steve who works so hard at several different professions just to keep his family supported. He is really an amazing guy and totally shocked me with the whole idea. Much later I came home very sore, stiff and very happy and relaxed. Thanks Steve for your very special birthday gift.
When I got home I made some toast from my new loaf of bread and then Lois came over to invite us over for some cake and to meet their friends. We sat on the back deck in the cool evening breezes with the torches burning enjoying a very relaxing time with genuine people. How can you beat that and great cake too.
Now we are winding down. Ken and I will walk tomorrow early and then I'll take care of a few things around the house getting ready for our friends and neighbors in the late afternoon. This getting older might not be so tough if it means getting to spend time with such great friends and relatives. This evening Dana called from Houston to bring me up to speed on lots of things but to also mention she and Ron came home from their special gambling get away spot called Chishada (spelling probably totally wrong), they came home with $1800 in winnings. Wow, I am impressed.
What a blessed day, not one I could have planned ahead of time and one that had so much joy and peace in it.
love to all,

Tim

A blessed week

Good evening Friends and Family,



How are you doing tonight? Its 5:40 and I'm getting started on the blog early. I got the nicest and very funny card from Marilyn Bitzer today, it got us both laughing as we read. Thanks Marilyn for all you have done to help. So far today I've got the spa clean and I think I have it heating now, hope so. I've done the lawn, the edging and pretty soon will cut back some of the plants that grow too large in the front yard. Marilyn took me to lunch at our local place and we both enjoyed good salads, nice sandwiches and watching the boats come and go. I went out to water the tomato plants today and discovered I had two baskets full, what a nice shock.



This week has brought positive things and troubling ones as well. Its so nice to see Keanna enjoying her school experience and she has turned out to be a very bright little person. Of course Kallie brings joy with her smile and baby movements. She is a kick and Jason and Jo have reported Timothy is doing great in his walker and getting very close to walking as well. He crawls very fast and loves it. In a couple weeks I hope to be able to visit for a weekend and see him in action up close and personal.



Marilyn is enjoying her stay, she loves to read and relax but you've better not mess with her around 2 pm when General Hospital is on and of course Comcast cable often fails to deliver a decent signal on the big TV on channel 7, (they say its the wiring, right) so she has to scramble to located a TV which gets the channel during that time. We've been thinking about what drinks to have available on Sunday for the get together, I know I've heard of fresh corn coming, potato salad, watermelon and we've purchased Boca burgers and real burgers and Ray is going to turn them into magic on the BBQ. Joyce Conner just emailed to offer tempting fresh tomatoes and peaches, oh yes! I baked a new loaf of bread today but I'm pretty sure that would not go very far in feeding the 5,000. Sure made the house smell good for awhile though.



I will write more later and then launch the blog.

Well now is later, 9:38. Marilyn and I took a check to a drop box for the garage pickup, either a check or no garbage pickup, then we stopped by Chili's for dinner. Now home for an early turn in time tonight. Up early to walk and then pick up Keanna for Sabbath School, do a little thing at church, then meet up with Bob and Carrol at Olive Garden. It will be fun to see them and find out how they are doing.

This evening I am thankful for many things and still seeking God's answers for many more. While this present life presents many challenges one by one they are being met and survived. It will be quite different to be 60 years old. I tend not to have a lot of deep thoughts period but to consider how many years I have been privileged to live, to have lived some many of them with wonderful people and especially Nan, well there is certainly much to be grateful for. Now as to the future I have few expectations. I've discovered from the grief group that others feel the same way, they don't expect too much good to happen in the future, I think that goes with the memory of the recent pain and loss which tends to overshadow future expectations. I do know this, I love to see my kids succeed, live well, care for each other, I love to observe and help with the little ones. Its a rare opportunity to see life in its infancy again through the little ones, pure, uncomplicated, honest and full of energy and hope.

Oh God make of me what you want in your timing and for your purposes and for your glory.

love

tim

Really nice to get to live in America

Dear Family and Friends,

Today has been long, productive, effective, meaningful, safe and emotionally satisfying. It started at 6 am, out the door at 6:40, arrive in Petaluma at 8:35, register, part with $92.50 for fees, eat bagel, find place in room with 60 appraisers, listen and learn about the REO process, that is foreclosures. At 12:10 the meeting was over and I found a Burger King and a vegeburger. Then I set the GPS for Suisun City and 45 minutes later pulled up beside the home. This one was worn a bit but not too bad, unlock 4 front door locks, inspect, measure, photograph and then sit in the car and pick comps. Drive the comps and photograph each. Then it was time to set the GPS for a Richmond address. I arrived there early and enjoyed a very pleasant visit, loved the house which was so clean and updated, shot comps, set GPS for home and set out at 4 pm. I arrived home at 5:35 after working my way through accidents, firetrucks, traffic, you know the normal stuff.

As I walked in I could tell something good was happening. Marilyn had whipped together some great food and it was so fun to just sit with her and eat and enjoy the flavors of asparagus, green beans, mushrooms, vege chicken pieces, cottage cheese. A feast! Then Keanna and Kallie arrived and Nikki went to the parent teacher event at the school and we got the kids for awhile. I made pasta for Keanna along with green beans and some bottled water, Marilyn held Kallie, fed her, changed her and they exchanged smiles. When Nikki came back I went to the grief group, now I'm home to finally collapse and relax.

Tomorrow is the day to tidy up a bit so you will have a place to sit when you come to visit on Sunday, so the spa will be cleaner, the deck will be safer and the family photos will be removed from the dining room table, the fish tank will have less algae, the plants in the front yard are trimmed back, lawn mowed. Yep, I should have enough to keep me busy tomorrow, oh and write some appraisals too.

So good night from here, life in America is so special, a country that loves freedom and makes it work pretty well. I've been to lots of other countries and loved everyone of them but I've always been glad to come back to the good old USA. We all should be very grateful for the opportunity to live, work and prosper here.

love to all, Sunday's open house is going to be fun, bring your best conversation and lets talk and learn from each other.

Tim

ps fresh photos of our girls taken yesterday morning, so cute. Thanks Nikki for sharing them.