Dear Family and Friends,
10:05 and this is the end of an interesting day. So far today I've taken 11,913 sf, emailed out several reports, worked on getting a quote of a new E&O, gave up on AT&T for the business line and signed up with Vonage at a much less expensive rate. I bid Marilyn farewell as she left for Sacramento to see her friend and sister, attend the state fair and have some fun. But this evening was the high point of my day.
Nikki needed to take Keanna to our park for a school picnic play event. In spite of temperatures over 100 the event went forward. However Kallie would not have appreciated the extreme heat so Nikki asked if she could stay here in the air conditioned home with me. Well I was delighted. They arrived, Nikki quickly made dinner, Keanna was in rare form, cute as a bug and full of life. She was excited about playing with her friends in the park. After dinner Nikki and Keanna left for the park and Kallie and I had bonding time. We started in the recliner with her resting on my chest, she lifted her head and looked around, smiled and eventually started to cry. So I relocated where I could hold her better and fed her a bottle. What pure bliss to watch her eat, smile and wave her hands and then gradually fall asleep in my arms. So when Nikki and Keanna returned she was sleeping in her pappas arms. It was a magic moment, one I will always remember. Then it was time for them to head home and for me to head to the grief group.
Going to grief group is always a challenge, someone is in serious trouble every week but not always the same person. Tonight was no exception and there were many smiles, laughs and tears shed as we each shared our week's high and low points and discussed the changes that take place after the first year of loss. I'm learning that I will always have a special love place in my heart for Nan, filled with our lives and experiences and still at the same time I may eventually find a new place for someone else, not to replace Nan or the positive memories of her. There is no replacing Nan. But as life progresses there may be new opportunities for happiness and meaning in life.
I'm going to put a couple photos in tonight. The one of the black dog, Lady, was taken by Keanna.
Sending my love and appreciation for each of you who help fill the gaps created by loss.
love
tim
1 comment:
Good Evening Tim,
I hope your day has gone well for you and you are beginning to wind down a bit. It sounds like you had a profitable week as well as having special time with family and friends.
I went to Dollywood yesterday with a couple of friends. I thought of Nan and some things I would like to share with her ~ like the Kingdom Heirs' shirts are much better this year. The screechy tenor is really improving. The shows were great even though there aren't any new ones this year. The weather was perfect. Yes, we had some special times together at Dollywood and I will never be able to go there without memories of Nan and the fun we had together. And there were a couple of times when she had the blockages. Those weren't quite so much fun....
Have a blessed Sabbath with your Lord and remember His blessings of this last week.
Love ~ Carol
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