Kidos make the day

Well we all made it through the night. I finally fell asleep about 2 am and Kallie stirred at 5:05 and I finally got her bottle, changed her and rocked her at 5:30. Then she went blissfully back to sleep and so did I. Keanna slept until after 7 am. Then the fun started. Kallie was ready to head downstairs and delivered a very special diaper in the process! I let her crawl a bit on the floor and play with her very special little standing toy. Keanna finally was ready to eat so I made her breakfast. Steve arrived around 8 to take Kallie home and Keanna and I left for Sabbath School. When we arrived a bit late we found the room totally full of kids. It was exciting and the teacher did a great job with the stories, songs and activities.
After Sabbath School and getting to see friends we went to McDonalds where a new Pet Shop series of toys are being given with happy meals. So Keanna ate and played for awhile in the play area, met lots of kids and had fun. Then we drove home and I delivered her to her parents. I drove home determined to catch some sleep but it sort of eluded me. I pulled out the great heated cover and settled with Starr into the recliner but phone calls and the call of finding lunch kept me from sleeping. This evening found me at Longs to collect several bottles of pills that were ready. Then back home to watch a movie, Hildalgo, a story of a cowboy who raced his mustang pony in the Arabian desert, great story filled with beautiful photography of the desert and the racing horses. When my brother called I was able to just put it on hold and since it was DVR it just sat there waiting until we finished talking.
I did a bit of grocery shopping and Nikki pointed out a coupon that knocked $10 off the price of anything over $50. So my $75 in grocery purchasing cost $65. Not bad and now I'm set for a few more days. I took a chance on hot house tomatoes, they were cheap, now we'll see if they are any good or not.
This morning at 7:30 Jason, Jo and Timothy called. We put the phone on speaker as I was wrestling Kallie at the moment changing a diaper and when she is getting changed her arms and legs wind up with power and just keep kicking. We got to talk to Timothy and he heard the girls talking and it was fun, sort of a very nice family moment. In a few days that same call will be more interesting as I will have the new video phone and so will Jason and Jo, then when we talk we will be able to see each other. It will be great.
This evening I ordered Direct TV through ACN, my company. For less money than what I pay now with Comcast I'll add HD and several more channels. Since two of the TV's in the house are HD it will be nice to see them that way.
I hope you had a very enjoyable Saturday and will also have a great day tomorrow. In times like these which verge on almost depression experiences for many we just have to hold onto each other, encourage each other, drive more sanely, smile more, care more and fight less. There has never been a time when possessions mattered less or should matter less. Now its real, about people, no class warfare, in fact no warfare between citizens at all. We need everyone pulling the same direction. Personal responsibility, hard work, honesty and a determination that we will recover. It will work.
Good night my friends and family,
love

Tim

kidos on board!

Dear Family and Friends,

It is quiet now and the angels are sleeping. Kallie went down a little past 7 and Keanna finally gave up at 9:30. Both were tired and ready to sleep, at least I think so. It is a warm evening, perhaps too warm for them to rest well but I don't want to put the ceiling fan on to create a chill either, one just never knows for sure.

The day started at 6 with a quick shower and then on time arrival so Steve and Nikki could slip away to work. Both girls slept in until after 8 and then it was a bit of a mad rush to get them to school and sitters. After a bit of quick research I left in the bug for an appraisal in Sonora which is about 2 hours away. Upon arrival I found a very interesting person, this former hells angel lives alone, has beautiful Italian antiques, a corvette, guns everywhere and a pretty sour attitude toward authority in general or nosy neighbors. I enjoyed his wit and approach to live and had a great time seeing his property on the side of a hill. Then of course it was time to locate the comps, the GPS system really had a workout today and led me all over the hills to various properties. Some nicer, some worse but all over. After shooting a photo of the last one I set the GPS for lunch, it found an Applebees a few miles away but computed for over a minute to find a way out of the mess of tiny roads. The lunch was perfect with dark bread grilled with cheese and tomatoes. I was really ready to eat. Then I set the GPS for home and it warned me I faced 86 miles and over two hours of travel. Fortunately its hours are usually off a bit and at 5:15 I pulled into the driveway. Soon after Nikki arrived with the girls, helped with Kallie's dinner and then left for her scrapbooking party nearby. I spent the evening fixing Keanna's dinner and my own, hold Kallie, feeding her a bottle, changing her into night clothes and finally asking angels to keep her safe as I laid her in her little crib. Moments don't get much better than to say good night to these precious little ones, Keanna asked if she could do the praying and she prayed for Grammy, her kitties and Noka dog, all who have left us to their rest.

Now the house is quiet except for an occasional noise from Kallie's room. Nikki will check in at midnight to see if she should come get Kallie or let her sleep until morning here. We will see.

The weather was so good today, warm, sunny, clear blue skies and snow in the mountains where I was, a bit here and there on the ground still. It was a calming day after a rushed start, seemed like there were so many people wanting a tiny piece of my time just when I was about to hit the road and that put me on the road late. Yet it all turned out well. I listened to old time radio programs on XM as I drove and the stories were so decent, so natural and so different from the madness of today.

Do you find yourself just having to place your fears, concerns and disappointments with decisions being made in Washington right now, place them in the Lord's hands, some of the things being done are so wrong, so contrary to faith, so secular. Yet God knows everything and He is not asleep and in His hands can be found real security in spite of horrible financial decisions that are being made, ones that Timothy, Kallie and Keanna will be paying for.

Oh Lord come quickly, not our will but yours.

Have an enjoyable day of worship, spend time with family, get out into nature if you can, fellowship with precious people and savor life. It is good!

love

tim

ps Photos are compliments of George and Yvonne from a recent visit to Olive Garden. Thanks for sharing the fun pictures.

also special thanks to Pam Whitted for supplying a powered cat box which still works great and makes my life so much easier and for a sack of oranges from her back yard trees. They are totally great tasting and just keep on giving joy!

Keanna is well, I'm back on the road

Dear Family and Friends,
Today Ken and I walked at 6 am, then after quick research I drove to a property just below SF, inspected it and then drove down beautiful 280, one of the worlds most beautiful freeways. I arrived early in Campbell and enjoyed my visit there. Then to Olive Garden for some quick lunch and back to work. When I arrived home I discovered the power had failed and amazingly it just came back on now, at nearly 9. So all of that precious time to satisfy clients was lost. So hard to get the computer to work with a candle as power. Since the power was out I went to watch Keanna at tumbling class and then we had dinner at La Villa. When I arrived home it was still dark. Now it is bright with power again. But oh I have so much to do before I head to bed and then its up at 6 to care for the precious kidos.

So I'm wishing you a good evening and a great weekend ahead. No matter what has happened in your life tomorrow is a new day to write your history on. I'm driving up to Sonora to do an appraisal and then back to care for Keanna and Kallie tomorrow evening. That will be a challenge and fun too.

Love to all

Tim

Keanna's health improves

Dear Family and Friends
Just back from an appraisal in Napa. Very nice family, enjoyable visit and a remodeled home. Still its a long ways away. I stopped by the Old Spaghetti Factory in Concord for dinner and of course ate too much. At least I ask for the wheat pasta.
This morning I went to wake and deliver the girls but Keanna stayed asleep until about 8:10 and then had a fever when I woke her. Kallie slept in late too but woke with a smile like usual. I delivered Kallie to her wonderful sitters and then brought Keanna here where she took it easy, drank water, watched silly programs. Nikki came home early and brought some yummy pizza for she and I. Wow it was good. Then they went home and I worked a bit before leaving for Napa. Being unsure of the traffic I would encounter I left early and arrived a bit early too. It all worked out fine.
I continue to enjoy good health which is taking some time to get used to. A couple of appraisals have died so I'm pretty slim on orders but Tom, my hardworking agent who works Oakland has many new orders on the way so that will help for the future.
I'm sorting things out in regards to the grief group. I think I might use my time better in building the new business rather than attend every week. I'm feeling a bit squeezed out at this point but the group has been so helpful for the time I have attended I will always be grateful to all the participants.
Tomorrow I'm out fairly early to see one in Milbrae and then one in Campbell before heading home. I've had another one scheduled for two weeks in Concord but received word today it has cancelled. Sad as it was COD. Oh well the Lord will provide. He has been very good to me.
So now I'm drifting, sleepy, tired and exhausted. If only I could just dump the 75 lbs I carry extra, I would be a new person. Was down a couple pounds this morning which was very nice.
I send my best regards to all,
love

tim

Keanna falls ill

Dear Family and Friends,
Well this morning I drove to Steve and Nikki's which is nearby to watch the kidos so both Steve and Nikki could get to their early morning jobs. Money is tight and you've just got to work when there is work to be had. When Keanna woke she was sick, had a fever and was coughing really badly. Eventually I delivered Kallie to her sitters but kept Keanna with me for the day. She rested, watched some TV, drank lots of water, had lunch and just tried to get well. Nikki came mid afternoon to take her home where she finally got some extra rest. later in the afternoon I picked up Kallie and delivered her home. When I arrived at the sitters who just happen to be marvelous people, they had her in a high chair and she was munching on Rice Crispies, it was so cute, a few made it into her mouth and many fell to the the floor, she was enjoying herself, smiling, kicking and having great fun.
I worked around Keanna's needs today and got the rest of the week scheduled. later in the day the mid day appraisal fell through for tomorrow so I have just one, a 5 pm in Napa tomorrow evening. So If need be I can help with Keanna tomorrow too. It really got to me to hear her cough and then say, I don't feel so well, having just come through months of coughing I totally understand what she was feeling. I did everything I knew how to do to help her, kept the house warm, kept her under a blanket, kept her water bottle full of fresh water, put Vick's on the soles of her feet just in case it might help. Her blue eyes were so sad from the fever and illness. It all came on fast as she was fine on Sabbath and even Sunday but had to go home from school on Monday and then was worse today. Have you heard about all the sickness this winter, seems nearly everyone I meet is battling with it in a serious manner.
This evening I've been a business meeting learning more things about the company I've become a part of. I am very pleased with everything I'm learning. But by far the most exciting part is the video phone. With it I could be talking to Timothy and we could see each other perfectly while we talked. I'm hearing wonderful stories where grandparents help their kidos with their homework over the video phone each evening even though they live across the country from each other. It is the next wave and with Donald Trump having a 2 hour special next month introducing the phone through his show I think a lot of people will want to have one. If the idea of having video phone calls to family and friends appeals to you email me or call and I'll help it happen, you can be up and talking in a week and that is across the country or across town, no long distance charges, just one monthly fee and it can replace a phone line you already have, you can even keep your phone number. Yes I'm excited about it and perhaps I can keep in touch better with my wonderful Texas kin!
Well this cowboy better hit the hay as 6 am comes early these days.
Sending love to all, we can do this thing called life. We can do it well and with God's help we can enhance each others lives. Junk, possessions, power, prestige they don't matter but people do, relationships do, picking up our shattered lives and moving forward no matter what we have done, finding forgiveness including forgiving ourselves and living this day better than the last.
love

tim

Alive and well

Dear Family and Friends,

Well I'm pumped, its been a great day, adventures from helping Ray get his car out of the mud, inspect a cute Salt Box style house in Tracy, lunch at Olive Garden, write appraisals, walk in the rain with Ken and now I've been playing with my new business on the Internet. I am so excited about the video phone, I just can't wait to be able to call Timothy and not only hear him but see him in action too. And finally after hearing about such devices for years its here and now.

Health wise I have hardly coughed today at all. It feels so good to be able to go out in public without coughing myself under the table. Ken and I walked this morning and it all went fine for the first 1/2 of the route, then tiny sprinkles started and before long it was a steady drizzle. We stayed warm and did fine but were a bit damp by the time we got home. Of course with the house warm and comfortable being a damp was no problem.

In the morning I get to get the kidos ready for school and help Steve and Nikki out. It will be fun to see them in action, they are just so cute and lovable. I know all of you with grandchildren know what I mean and those of you who have not yet been blessed think the rest of us are nuts. If we are its a great way to go. Little ones do cute things, say cute things and see the world totally different than grownups and its fun to reconnect with childhood again.

Well I'm heading to bed earlier than usual tonight, I was sleepy today as I drove about. One of the high points of the day was to talk to Dana, Nan's sister from Houston. She and her family are coming to visit this summer for awhile and we are all looking forward to seeing each other again. In spite of the bad economy Ron has been able to retain his job in the underground movement of oil and other chemicals across the south, not easy and high stress but very important.

I'm about to give up Comcast and obtain Direct dish, less money, more channels and NO MORE COMCAST cable service for TV. But my favorite of them all is my little 3ABN dish that gives me worship services and great music. Talk about a gift that keeps on giving and giving.

I send my greetings to all,

love

tim

Blustery winter day, we'll take all we can get

Dear Friends and Family,
I write from soggy California, does not happen often enough but for now we've got rain and wind, snow in the low hills and we need every drop so the farmers can grow the crops, so we can eat, so our economy can come roaring back!
This has been a low key day in some ways. I've tried to just keep working and have managed to write a couple reports. Then I had the bright idea of downloading a new version of software for writing appraisals. I pay $78 dollars a month for this software but had never completed the download process. Does it seem to you that every time you download a new better version that something major goes wrong? Jim, my beloved IT expert says avoid downloads and upgrades if at all possible. Well in this case since the industry has decided that we need to write a couple more pages in each report explaining the market conditions and we all have to be up and ready to do it by April I decided that I'd better figure out what is needed before the last minute. Also I was feeling adventurous, bored sort of at the moment. I hit the download file and it started doing its magic. Of course when it was done the appraisal would not close, I could not sign it with the digital signature and I was out of business. Well I talked to the ultimate IT guy upstairs explaining that it was not a huge deal but it sure would be nice to see it work again. Then after the 50Th try I happened to notice, did an angel point my eyes to it, that the version I had the approval code for was 7.9 and I had just downloaded the version 7. Could that be the problem? So I went back to the web site, downloaded the 7.9 version shaking in my slippers that I would do something wrong and it works. Wow what a relief. The new software is much quicker acting and has features unthought of in the last version so now I'm jazzed.
Also I started a loaf of bread this morning and it finished before noon. What a simple but tasty addition to my lifestyle, home made bread. I'm so spoiled that I never buy bread now, just make my own. I'm not sure if anyone else would like it but I'm not over concerned about that right now, I like it.
Tomorrow morning I get to do a bit of pappa daycare. I arrive at Nikki and Steves no later than 6:30 and slip in quietly. At 8 or before Keanna gets up and Kallie should be waking about then too. I prepare Keanna breakfast and get Kallie out of her sleeping sack, bring her down and get her ready to travel, then load both of them into the van and do a delivery run. So at 8:30 my day starts and they are lovingly delivered. I look forward to it.
I've enjoyed looking at my web site for the new company I joined last night and have decided to go to Direct TV dish, cancel Comcast TV cable, save a whole bunch of money and have HD and more channels, seems like a great idea to me. I'm also going to order a new video phone as soon as I can afford it and then with one at Jason and Jo's house I can see Timothy in action when we talk, not just hear him. I hope we can do the same for Jo's mom so she can see him over the phone too. With this new good stuff out there available to us I think its great when we can take advantage of it to help family! You can go to my website and order anything, look around and see what you think. It is www.myacn.com, put in my number 01840789 and my password is appraise1 and see what you think. Let me know if all of this works for you. I'm learning more every day but I'm pretty jazzed about the services and products with better prices. Any way to save right now makes great sense.
Well its time for some soup. I hope your week is lining up to be a good one, I hope your job is secure that the really important things are OK, relationships with your family and friends.
Bob and Carrol wrote to the blog mentioning something I just happened to forget, that was Carrol was on a roll, we got slaughtered by this master of the game yesterday. never, never play any game with her for money or you will be hurting, she is amazing, has the touch! I had a blast while I was losing, they are so nice that I didn't even care, just keep the rhubarb pie coming with a tiny bit of ice cream and I'll lose gracefully every time.
Take care and keep God close, He has a lot of loving He needs us to do for those who are hurting, lonely or frightened. That link from last night is really good and I've heard from several people who enjoyed it and were challenged by it. I know I was.

love to all

Tim

Keanna goes to Sabbath School

Dear Family and Friends,
What a great day! It all started with a hurried walk to the park with Starr and Lady. Then after oatmeal and an orange it was the shower, then find clothes that fit and off to pick up Miss Keanna. She was in a great mood and Kallie was having fun in her little play prison moving through her toys. Keanna kept me in stitches as we drove the 25 minutes to Sabbath School with her wise comments about people, life and upcoming birthday gift ideas.
In Sabbath School today she adopted the "good" girl mode and sang loudly, helped with everything that came along and made me proud. Then it was a quick stop at McDonalds for some chicken pieces and apple juice and a miss kitty watch girl toy.
We drove back to the house and she told me her address so we put it in the GPS and she was intrigued by the "bossy lady" voice of the GPS as it told us every move to make. Then Keanna was off to a birthday party and I drove to Bob and Carrol's place in Lodi. From there we went to Coco's, a nearby coffee shop for some excellent garden burgers. Then it was back to their house for dessert, Rubbarb pie, wow was it ever good.
They then proceeded to introduce me to a new type of dominos and we played for hours, listened to beautiful music and caught up on everything.
This evening I attended a business presentation which was really well done. The high or low point of the meeting was when a lady fell down the stairs, her chair was just too close to the steps and she tumbled. Fortunately she seemed to escape without injury but it was very tense for a moment or two.
Now I'm home, Art was kind enough to talk me through the drive home as I was beginning to be a bit sleepy. Ken called from next door to tell me my garage door was open, talk about great neighbors, they really keep a watch out to make sure I'm OK and I appreciate it very much. We are going to try to walk in the morning if we can find an opening in the clouds between rain showers.
What a blessed Sabbath with family, friends, music and relaxing time. I'm going to try to link something in the blog tonight. I hope it works as it has some very profound words, challenging really regarding the future and happiness, beautiful photos and decent music as well. I hope it works.
Love to all,

Tim

http://www.greatdanepromilitary.com/Life/index.htm

Oh blessed Sabbath!

Dear Family and Friends,

Finally this long week has come to a close. It has been a great week with lots of production, checks coming in, health returning and today the sunshine was brilliant.

I've included a photo taken this afternoon from the back of a house I was inspecting. One finds little spots of beauty in surprising places. I am also continually reminded of how decent most americans are. I inspected a home in Bethel Island this morning and enjoyed meeting the owners very much. The home was little, updated in every room and has a quiet setting overlooking the water. The purpose of this inspection was to help the owner get his property taxes reduced as values have plunged in that area. When I left I found it was lunch time so I ventured into LaVilla, a family owned place that serves great food for very little moola. Nice lunch served within 5 minutes and the total came to $6.00. I can handle that.

Then it was a quick stop at PetCo for a bag of dog food for my little darlings. Then right home and to work on the oldest appraisal, a 3 unit located in a tough area to work. I had been putting it off with excuses. Today was the day to bit the bullet and get it done. It is done, yea!

I feel so much better than I did at the start of the week. However I spent the entire morning with lungs, chest hurting and then gradually the pain disappeared, I took the blood sugar and it was 148 so I was not having a low sugar experience. Lois came with a tempting offer this afternoon, to go shopping but I had to say no as I really needed to keep myself focused and in this chair. Finally now I can escape, watch the christian dish programs, find something to eat and relax.

How is your weekend looking? Do you have times to be with loved ones, some time in nature, time to listen to music or read a book? How bout calling someone you love and have been meaning to call? I think we are programed to settle into ruts and we have to make decisions about getting out of them and back into adventure again. I've spent a lot of time reflecting on my life with Nan this week, not intentionally but it has happened. I'm very comfortable with the memories of this great lady, of course I wish she were here and I deeply resent the fact that she is not. Sorry but I'm not at peace with the reasons why but it does not stop me from living well.

So I wish each of you a peaceful weekend filled with love.

Tim

Going strong again

Dear Family and Friends,
Wow, what a day! First our walk around the lake, then a quick breakfast and I sat to work. After completing three appraisals I showered and hit the road. Made a quick delivery of an appraisal and then went to observe Keanna in her tumbling class, the child does things that make a pappa gasp. Kallie was ready to eat so I held her while her mom shoveled it in. Then we quickly went to a nearby Mexican place and grabbed a bean burrito. Then I went my way and they headed home.
After I left I drove to the Contra Costa Regional Medical Center in Martinez where I visited a relative I had not ever met. My brother is married to Donna and one of her daughters was in the hospital with a fairly serious condition but lives in Concord with no family members anywhere nearby. So I had the opportunity to meet her this evening, what a great time we had sharing stories and learning about each other's life. She is to be released tomorrow.
When I left the hospital I discovered the van had just 10 miles left on the current fuel in the tank. So I located fuel and as I drove home decided to take it easy. There was no traffic, an open road and I was in no rush. I set the cruise on 55 and watched the computer as it calculated the current MPG. Soon it climbed to 28 and then 29 and moved between 28 and 29 all the way home. Not bad for a car that is over 4,000 lbs. So I enjoyed my drive home with a heated leather seat, lumbar support, XM on the radio and a quiet ride. Sort of fun compared to my little bug which sort of bounces down the road as it gets its 44 or 45 miles per gallon, has no heated seat and requires frequent shifting.
Today has been a day with hardly any coughing at all and a general feeling of I can do this again instead of dread and concern. Of course the fact that Judy, a wonderful mortgage broker, just happened to drop $675 in my mailbox this morning and then more money came in the mail, that helps too. So far I've been able to manage my ongoing bills as they have come up and if all continues to go well I'll get ahead enough to cover some very important other looming bills I owe.
All in all I am very satisfied with the day, with better health, with blessings of all kinds and shapes and with the chance to visit someone stuck in a hospital bed. I do know my way around hospitals do to past experiences and I know how awful it is to be stick there, half dressed, constantly woken up to take sleeping pills and vitals, hoping for tasty food that hardly ever comes, listening to the beeping due to air in the line of the IV pump and growing tired of the daily TV fare. One begins to dream of escape.
Well in 20 hours the Sabbath will be here and it will be welcome. Putting the cares and stress of this life aside and renewing family ties, catch up on reading, listen to great music, worship, fellowship. What a huge blessing Sabbath is and I need it so much, so do you.
So I'm sending good vibes to all, thanking you for recipes for slow cooked foods and just wanting you to know, you are loved and appreciated.

love

tim
A friend who is battling GIST and is now facing new surgery wrote these words to me today.

Embracing fear allows the opposition to win without a battle.I don't like that.So, I shall continue.All that it takes for evil to win is for good men to do nothing.Someone wiser than me said that.But, I embrace it.

Working hard, feels very good

Dear Family and Friends,
Less coughing, more living, yes!
6:35 walk with athletic director Ken
7:30 become fry cook, make eggs and toast, stripples and an orange
8:30 at work, begin to write appraisals
2:30 leave for Orangevale having written two appraisals
4:05 arrive in Orangevale, do inspection, shoot comps, watch sun set whew!
5:30 arrive at Old Spaghetti Factory in Roseville, enjoy managers favorite
7:35 arrive home, have pie with Lois and Ray, meet all their creatures
8:00 back home, check emails, feed fish, take meds
9:00 begin process of going to bed, very tired, very satisfied

I had an interesting moment this morning, one that was a total surprise, shock really. As I work I often have a classical station playing through the Bose speakers connected to my computer. During a break between numbers the announcer was speaking of Boston and suddenly I was in Boston, in the Intensive Care Unit and Keanna was singing her little songs in an attempt to wake her grammy and just like the actual day when she did it I found myself with tears flowing down my cheeks and then after speaking to Nikki for a minute on the phone I was fine, storm over and I went back to work. Totally blind sided by precious memories and special time with Nan!

I'm finally busy with work these days, not over busy but enough to use up all my available time. This is the way out of the financial jungle, production and I'm so pleased that work is coming in. This morning I took the time to fax in a number of pages to a company that is offering local work. The only problem is this, while they charge $400 for an appraisal they only pay the actual appraiser about $200. They keep the rest. Yes I know it seems like there should be a law against such practices but appraisers are about to have to deal with these management thieves a lot more in the near future. Its one of the reasons I'm considering other lines of income. One needs to be prepared for whatever happens.

I also signed up for a month of the SDA sight where you meet people. So far a couple of the ladies are really interesting, age appropriate but unfortunately live on the other side of the country.

Thank you for being a part of my extended family and I love hearing from you when you get a chance.

love

tim

Some rain must fall.......

Interesting day in my life, Ken called at 6:20 to say forget walking, pouring rain so I turned over and went back to sleep. Starr agreed completely. Since I could not eat this morning I set to work for awhile and drank large glasses of water. Then at 9:15 I left to make the largest deposit in over a year. Because of that deposit I was able to pay the house payment on time this month, what a total blessing and relief. The beautiful teller at the bank smiled as she thumbed through the deposit as she knows what a struggle that past year has been and she was happy for me. Then it was back into the rain and on to Tracy. I had a doctors visit with Dr. Makker but actually only saw an assistant. She measures several vitals using a little device that hooks to my right foot and my right arm. It measures fat to body mass rations, amount of water in the cells and on the outside of the cells and several other factors. The results were not good and I didn't expect them to be as I've been totally bad dieting wise. A feeble excuse is that I've felt so crummy that when I do eat I don't do it very carefully at all. Instead of chewing me out she explained that I'm in the phase of consideration. She said many people go through this where they are so afraid to make the big leap into a new way of life that they linger. She gently encouraged me to take little steps and she is right, I hate change and especially if it is going to take away something I'm used to. Yet as I look back at the journey so far since starting the "First Line Therapy" program I've started drinking much more water, using the protein bars for snacks so I'm rarely experiencing low blood sugars any more. I do not read labels and if its full of fat I leave it at Safeway, I don't need it in the house.
My next venture cooking wise is going to be starting to make my own soups and begin to use the wonderful stir fry system Lois and Ray gave me for Christmas. I'm ready to make the plunge. Now I need to see if I can locate a slow cooker, I know I have a couple, now to find them with Sylvia in Surinam.
After the doctor visit I drove directly to Taco Bell for a burrito as I'd had nothing to eat since last night. Then I headed to Discovery Bay to do two appraisals. I dreaded the rain which was falling in buckets all the way home. Yet I was fortunate in that the rain lessened while I was doing the inspections and then began again as I drove about taking comp photos. What is sad is the price these homes are selling for. 2,900 SF for $259,000. Yes the house needed paint and carpet but it had a great floor plan, quiet location in a gated community and lovely features. There are so many deals to be had the prices keep going lower. One wonders where it stops as there are still plenty of bank owned properties for sale. I doubt the horrible package signed by the president today will do anything to help but will be something we will have to live with far after the economy recovers as it will on its own. Pouring huge amounts of money has never solved a recession once in the history of the world yet here we are doing it again, what a mistake.
I just have to remind myself that God is in control of the big picture, that He loves every human being and that He longs to come and take us all home with Him. We cannot lose sleep over what we cannot solve but we had better each one of us do everything we can to solve our own problems, not waiting for handouts from the government. We can do this.
I'm loving the sounds of the rain as it splashes to the concrete beside the house. When we used to park our motorhome beside the house we found that it was a tight fit so we cut off a bit of the roof overhang at the back corner of the garage so water splashes down right there in a special way.
This evening my coughing has turned nasty again, feels like a setback. I feel like my grief group has turned on me. I was told quite clearly not to show up as my coughing might injure someone else. I was told by my doctors that since I was on antibiotics I would not be infectious, anyway it is a good time to move on from the group.
My brother Jerry just called from Weed and reports that the snow in his lawn is about gone, since he lives in the shadow of Mt Shasta sort of he gets lots of snow and they are all used to it. Even his growing season for his huge garden is shorter than mine here due to the altitude.
Well once again it is time for me to crash, thanks for listening.

Take care and live carefully yet with courage and zest.

love

tim

To Oakhurst and back

Dear Family and Friends,

Its been a long day but one with safety, beautiful snow, nice people and so many long rainy miles. The entire trip this morning was in driving wind and rain. I decided to take the odyssey rather than the bug for an extra margin of safety. I was glad I did. I arrived at 10:45 and inspected the home in driving rain. How nice that he had a complete floor plan from a prior appraisal. The property was very special, had a huge shop, extra in law unit and a large main home which was in good shape. The 1 acre site was completely developed and included 3 old oak trees, decks, asphalt driveways and electric security gates. After I completed my inspection Bob Johnson, the loan officer, took me to lunch where I had a delicious garden burger. Then I set to work with a stop at the local MLS board. It was locked up tight, yup, a vacation day so my prime source of useful data was beyond reach. Fortunately I had brought my own research and proceeded to find each of the sales which were spread over a 5 mile radius. Just above the turn to the last two the traffic was stopped as chains were required. As I completed my work the snow began to fall and I've included a photo from the window of the street.

The trip home was uneventful but long. I pulled in about 7 pm and I'm soon going to be in the jetted tub in my bedroom and then head to bed.

When one is traveling long miles one has time to think, to reflect, to dream and to plan. I sincerely hope that the recovery path I seem to be on now will continue. I had several very serious bouts of coughing, ones that take the breath away totally but eventually the lungs sort of clear and then I can proceed with breathing again. When these sessions hit while driving it is alarming.

I face the blessing of a real pile of work both to see and to complete writing up. I was able to make the house payment early this month which is a step ahead.

I'm enjoying meeting people on Face Book and I'm still getting used to how to use it effectively.

I am so thankful for the rain. While it is a minor irritant in measuring homes the overall need for snow in the mountains and rain everywhere is so great, well its worth it.

So I'm sending tired but genuine love to all and asking that you pray for my little friend Kaleb Want. He is in the hospital and his symptoms are stumping the experts so far. He and his precious family needs our prayers.

love

tim

Blustery winter day, we'll take all we can get

Dear Family and Friends,
I'm just back from picking up Pam Whitted at the Sac airport. She had been visiting her daughter Shannon who now lives in Washington. We had a nice dinner in Sacramento and now I'm home. It was rain and wind all the way up but the weather improved as we drove back to Lodi. I'm supposed to venture out and drive to Oakhurst in the morning but I'm very concerned about snow and bad weather, not my favorite thing to take risks right now when my health is so fragile. I'll call my contact early in the morning to see how the weather is by then.
Today I've sat in this office chair with the company of Starr and Lady, written reports and cleaned up conditions and set up orders. Its been a good day overall with less coughing but there have been times when the cough has been so strong and intense that I can't catch my breath. Those times are a bit scary and unnerving.
I continue to assess the world around me and to try to figure out a game plan that will bring success in health, business and relationships. I know God likes to help people succeed and I'm getting ready to do just that.
Stay warm, dry and hug the one you are with.

love

tim
ps I've had some improvement today and thanks for the encouragement from friends.

Tim goes to the ER, fun and games

Dear Family and Friends,
This has been a strange day, not a typical Sabbath. I woke up after 7 this morning having slept pretty well. The mask and tube were freshly sterilized and that felt good. I came down and took the dogs to the park where they rejoiced in the fresh air. After coming home I sat down with a hot drink and watched the worship hour at Loma Linda University SDA Church. Randy Roberts had a wonderful sermon about treating all people equally. He has a wonderful method for preaching and its great to listen to. It was so much like church that I even dozed off for a minute while he was preaching. Later in the morning I watched the service held at Andrews University where Dwight Nelson was preaching. Over breakfast I watched as he spoke and he too communicated very well. After breakfast I continued to watch pastor Dwight in action.
I left for Sutter Delta Hospital to get a simple swab to test for whooping cough. Jim had called last night to ask me to have the test done this morning as there have been a few cases reported for adults in the general area. When I arrived I found the lab but they turned me away and finally I was directed back to the ER department where I was to spent the next two hours. Finally I was tested with a painful deep swab in my nose, then allowed to dress and finally was released. Now I wait until next Friday for results. Can you believe that, in this day and age it takes 6 days to get results, wow that was a shock.
This evening I am home with a fire going, watching a news special about how the congress arrived at this horrible spending bill, it is interesting to see how easily people spend other people's money and with very little hope that it will really help. At times like these when the temptation is to become upset over government stupidity one has to give it back to God knowing He is in charge and will bring all His children safely home soon.
I am becoming more aware of how important attitude is, how we look at life, how we approach each day, as a privilege, an opportunity or drudgery. I've learned painfully over the past few years that few dreams actually work out and that many hopes can be unfulfilled yet life has good moments, the world has good people, families are precious and each day is a new blank page to be written upon by our actions. How God loves us in spite of our weaknesses and failures. Oh that we could discover and practice that kind of love toward each other.
So this evening I still need your prayers, Jason and Timothy are ill this evening too and have been without power at their home most of the day so its not been a pleasant valentines day for them, I think they could use our prayers as well.

love to all

Tim

Sicker

Dear Family and Friends,
I'm sorry to have to report that my condition is getting worse. I've spent most of the day today coughing sometimes so violently that my body begins to perspire and at times my vision wavers. I can do little now without constant interruptions. I took the bug to get an oil change this afternoon. It was way past the right time to have it done. While I waited I had to step out of the waiting room frequently into the rain as the coughing was so constant it was unnerving to the other patrons. I stayed in my car as long as I could to avoid contact with others. When I picked up Kallie tonight I drove her home rather than have her exposed to the constant racket, it disturbs her to hear the coughing.
In spite of the way I felt I managed to see a house here in Discovery Bay this morning, 2,568 SF selling for $275,000, a new low for the area. Then it was on to San Leandro where I inspected a home with very reluctant tenants, only a court order had gotten all of us in, the whole house inspector and the termite inspector plus the selling agent, we all gathered at the same time and found a house that had been rebuilt just a few years ago with many pleasing features. After that inspection the coughing really began in earnest. I found a McDonalds and had a salad and decided to drive directly to Tracy for the oil change.
This evening Dr. Jim called to check up on me, it felt so good to have my friend call to see how I was doing and sadly I had only a report of worsening condition. So he has arranged more tests to be done at the Delta Sutter Hospital in the morning. He also had a novel idea that made a great deal of sense to me. He asked that I wash my cpap mask and tube to remove possible organisms that might be living there so I've just put it through a sterile wash cycle in the dishwasher, hoping that any bugs might be killed. He says he has one other patient who like me has battled for nearly 3 months. If you remember I became ill the first part of December and have not recovered since that time. I'm worn out, discouraged and feel like a leper right now. Jim has discussed Legionnaire's disease as a possibility too or valley fever. Right now as I write each breath rattles its way out of my lungs and every other breath is accompanied by a cough.
I would appreciate your prayers. I'm not doubting God at all through this experience but I'm seeking His help to solve it so I can have a life again and be able to work in a stronger way as well.
So my friends and family, safely through another week! One cannot stop from considering the families of the 50 who lost their life in the plane accident. It could have been any of us yet the suffering and grief has fallen on families that did not expect anything but the safe arrival of a loved one.
Love to all,

tim

TB scare

Dear Family and Friends,
I know its early but I'm heading for bed soon. When you take both DayQuil and a cough medicine with codeine you tend to begin to get sleepy eventually.
This has been another really rough day with hours of coughing and no relief.
This morning I had the high privilege of driving Sylvia to the airport in San Francisco where she was leaving for a bird watching trip in Surinam, at least that is where I think she is going. She flew as far as Miami today and is comfortably settled into a Days Inn this evening. She was so excited about this trip and in light of her history, remaining in Tracy for very long before leaving on a trip to somewhere was becoming unbearable. Now she is flying again and I wish her well.
After seeing her safely to the airport I drove across the Bay Bridge and on to Antioch for a followup visit to the doctors office where they confirmed I do NOT have TB, the test was negative. Then I drove directly to Livermore and arrived early for a noon appointment. I was so worn out from coughing and fever that I purposely fell asleep for awhile in the van. Waking I felt better and completed the appraisal assignment of a very nice home. After that I headed back to Discovery Bay to write up the report. I made a Taco Bell stop for a burrito and tostada.
At home I set to work on the appraisal and completed it just as it was time to travel to Tracy for the last appointment of the day. This one is interesting as its called a historical appraisal. That means they need a value for the house as of a certain day in April, 2001. On the way home I stopped in Mountain House to pick up a check for the work. As I was driving home Ken Sloan called. It was an interesting call. At the meeting on Wednesday people had become alarmed when I mentioned I was having a TB test and Ken was calling to let me know of the concern and to remember that people with chemo going on are very likely to catch anything floating around. While the intention of the call was good it helped me decide to just skip tonight's meeting. The facts are, I don't know what I am suffering from and it could be contagious. I doubt it and I've been informed by my doctor that once the antibiotics are in the risk to anyone of catching what I have is non existent. Anyway it was just the excuse I needed to just shine the group on. I drove to Brentwood to pick up Actos, one of the meds I take and while there hooked up with the girls. We had dinner at El Camino, a Mexican place located half way between Brentwood and Oakley. Now I'm home and very very tired.
This afternoon I was so desperate with constant coughing and misery that I raided the medicine cabinet. I took DayQuil and then when nothing happened I went back and took cough medicine that Dr. had ordered some time ago. It is laced with codeine and still I coughed.
At the present moment the coughing has calmed down and I'm going to bed before it wakes again. My prayers have become even more urgent that somehow, somewhere an answer can be located. I ache all over from coughing, my throat feels like fire, my head throbs and it is not as much fun as it sounds. really.
Looking forward to the weekend and the precious Sabbath hours.
Sending love to all,

Tim

Good day goes very bad

Walked this morning with Ken in the cold, actually felt very good to get home. Worked for awhile and then went to a new grief group being run by one of the guys who lost his wife over a year ago and felt that we needed a group just for survivors. It was the first meeting and as I expected to be on the road told Ken I couldn't make it but then when I cancelled the trip to Oakhurst due to my illness I decided to venture out to the group. It was very interesting and helpful. Dan, our original group leader came to be involved and had helpful hints. But with just a few of us in the room and all having lost pretty amazing spouses the conversation was deep, very open, tearful and helpful. The meeting ran too long, started at 10 and was not over until after 12:30. I can't afford that out of a work day every week, just too long of time.
After the group was over I came home to settle down to work. I managed to get a rebuttal written and a full appraisal for a Brentwood purchase. Lois offered to follow me to the RV parking lot if I wanted to put away the RV. I appreciated that very much and then we went to Subway for a whole wheat sandwich with garden burger pattie. The moment I completed the sandwich I began to cough. It was the worst coughing experience of my life. It lasted for many minutes and I went outside, walked, tried to take deep breaths but nothing has helped. Once home I took some of the heavy duty cough medicine and it has only touched the cough. The rest of the day has been better and I think the new antibiotic might be helping. I certainly hope so.
This evening has been a challenge as I've tried to keep working but every few seconds the coughing starts again. Oh will this ever pass?
I'm thankful for several orders that have come in, many with cod payment offered.
So my family and friends, hope your evening is going well.

love

tim

Wrestling with the problem

Dear Family and Friends,
At 7:55 this morning I was at my doctor's office in Antioch. At 8:30 I got to see Jim. He listened to my lungs, checked out the ears (waxy), nose, throat and then read in a book for doctors about infectious diseases for awhile. Finally he ordered a TB test just to be sure and a chest x ray. He prescribed Biaxin 500 mg twice a day and has high hopes it will provide the relief I am seeking. When I left his office I raced to the imaging lab but they couldn't rush if on fire so I had to walk out as I had an appointment in Discovery Bay at 10 to see a very large home which has sold. I was early, measured the house, shot the comps, came home and fixed a garden burger with grape juice, headed out to do an inspection in Brentwood and then managed to get the xray done and driving quickly picked up Keanna after school.
We headed home and while she played I "worked" which every time she came to check up on me I was asleep in the chair. Finally she persuaded me that a trip to the park was just what I needed and we had great fun in the very cold and windy park. She had mittens, a warm coat with a hood and I wore my ski jacket, brrr. When we got home Nikki was pulling up. The big event of the last 24 hours was Keanna losing her first tooth, right in the middle. She was concerned about how she would look but I assured her that losing a tooth was cute. The tooth fairy visited with some cash and it was all very exciting to our big girl.
This evening we all went to UNO's as Nikki had a coupon worth many bucks off. Food was great, service was very good and even though it was pretty late for the girls it was nice to all be together again. Steve had a huge day laying sod for a property that is on the market and was very sore and tired. He will no doubt sleep well tonight.
Dr. Jim called this evening to let me know the xray showed clear lungs, which is totally amazing to me, they don't feel clear but I am coughing a lot less tonight than this morning. Perhaps the new meds will help.
Sending love to all,

tim

Health takes a slide downhill

Dear Family and Friends,

This will be short. The coughing has become almost unbearable today and this afternoon it has been constant whether I had a cough drop in my mouth or not. My head aches, the ears feel solid, throat is raw and I'm heading to bed. I had to cancel a meeting I had at 5 and just drive home. I spent the afternoon in the beautiful Oakland hills where nearly every turn in the narrow roads leads to yet another view of the bay, the SF skyline, the bridges, all beautiful. Now I'm really getting tired of being this sick, something has to give and soon.

The day was a deceiver, beautiful sunshine and colder than you would expect. When I stepped out of the car I put on the big heavy ski coat just to survive the cold. Grabbed a few groceries as I was coming home and purchased the last of the Roma tomatoes for $1 a pound, found a deal on the kind of lettuce I like and headed home.

I started the day with the normal walk, then some great hot tea that Jo gave me to sooth the throat and it seemed to help this morning. As the day passed I felt worse and worse and right now its pretty bad. I did make a discovery in the garage yesterday, I found a wonderful device to do back massage that one of the kids provided their mom with to help with her pain several years ago. Its pretty strong but really gives you a workout, I'm heading there next and will follow it with a soak in the jetted tub in the bedroom. I'm including a couple photos Jo and Jason sent of Timothy taken on the 8th. He is changing so fast, becoming a little man and so cute.

Would appreciate your prayers when you get this, thanks.

love to all

Tim

Cranking out the work

Dear Family and Friends,
10:35 and I'm late to bed, oh well, seems if I go to bed on time I wake up at 5 in the morning and the dogs really don't like that, actually I'm not too keen on it either.
Art and Connie have made a safe trip back to Gilroy which when traveling in the winter is a good thing, safe trip. When Art asked me if it had rained here today I had to admit I didn't know. I was so focused on getting appraisal work completed that I pretty much stayed in my work chair. I had steel cut oats for breakfast, then the new loaf of bread was completed around noon so I had a slice with avocado, then late this afternoon brown rice with a bit of soup mixed in and green beans and this evening some tomato rice soup.
Ray and I were able to get the Internet working for Lois which is like life blood for her. She knows how to do so many things with her computer its amazing. Like this afternoon she took on the task of trying to cancel Nan's Internet provider which charges $21.95 every month. Yet I was not wanting to lose my ability to do the blog which I thought was somehow connected. Well it is but she managed to get the month amount down from $21.95 to just $5.00 a month, that is quite a savings, nice work. I think I'll turn her lose on Blue Cross and my medical insurance.
This evening Ray was kind enough to follow me down to the motorhome storage yard so I could put away the coach. The sign clearly states the hours are 7 am to 9 pm yet when I put in the code it said, yard was closed. Tomorrow the people that run the storage facility will have some explaining to do. This is the 3rd time they have messed up with the gate not working right and I'm getting tired of it. Time to find an alternate place to park it, there are several around.
At this point I only have one appraisal left to writeup and a few days ago I had 10. I am very thankful for the work and now thankful it is out the door and to the lenders.
I'm wondering how you are enjoying winter? My brother reported a constant snow fall this evening and last time I talked to Marilyn in Rhode Island she had been having snow for days. Roxanna from Conn. reports snow since Christmas. And I tend to complain if the temp drops below 40 degrees, shame on me.
Carol from N. Carolina reported this evening that for days the temp was freezing or less and today it was 70 degrees. That is change.
Well I'm looking forward to the week. I'm totally tired of constant coughing and I think I'm about to demand a chest XRay. I'm now into several months of being ill most of the time and frankly its getting old.
So now we have a new week to enact our brilliant story, I wish you the best as you begin anew to do a good job, keep your job and help someone who might have lost a job. In spite of the silly hysteria coming from Washington we are Americans and we will whip this present situation just like we have managed every other challenge, we will live with less, save more, try harder, be more patient, rediscover our values and win.
love to all,

Tim

A blessed day

Dear Family and Friends,
10:10 and I'm going to bed very soon. This morning started with an early call, 5:45. Ken and I walked our route in total darkness and for the first half I doubt Ken or I thought I would make it, coughing, shortness of breath but by the time I got home I was feeling much better, breathing better. I made eggs and had some toasted slices of my bread, banana. Then to the shower and out the door to pick up Keanna. She was rarin to go, cute as can be in a Sabbath dress and blue eyes blazing. We had an on time arrival, rare for the two of us. Keanna did a very good job of being a good example to younger kids in Sabbath School. Then it was off to see Sylvia. We stayed in the other room where slightly older kids have Sabbath School for awhile and then Keanna and I met Nikki and Kallie for lunch. Kallie had her first "wheel" cookie thing and watched every movement of everyone at other tables around us. The eggplant was perfect and really hit the spot. We missed you Bob and Carrol but understand how important recovery from illness is. Then Nikki had a couple errands so I kept Kallie with me, she slept for a bit but then was up and ready to see. So I held her in the drivers seat for awhile where she chewed on the steering wheel, reached repeatedly for the keys, looked out the window, smiled, grumbled and mostly wiggled. What a cutie she is and so much fun to hold and watch in action.
Then it was home to do a little repair in a Internet cable next door and rest for a bit, have dinner and then drive to my friend's house, Jim and Marti Edwards. I really had a great time learning about options and then drove home, tired but very upbeat. I don't feel well, many sessions of coughing today and that is debilitating at best.
Somewhere, somehow there are solutions to the illness I am experiencing. At least I certainly hope so.
I was struck again this morning with how nice it is to put on new tennis shoes every morning. I love them, I never have any food pain or leg pain since buying them, thanks so much Roger and Carol, the shoes are perfect.
So good night my family, my friends. I hope your day has brought you love, peace, joy and sanity.

love

tim

Safely through another week

Whew, this one is in the history books. During this week I've had a relapse of the chest problems and severe coughing with related chest pains and some fever. I skated on the sharp edge of financial challenges but on that score was able to make two deposits today which will cover health care, various insurance premiums, data charges, phone etc. So on that score I am very grateful to be once again in the black. Of course to get there I relentlessly pursued money people were ready to part with, Newark, Concord were the stops in the driving rain but it was worth it.
Orders have continued to come in, not at the rate of the old days but still in this time any order is a blessing. Right now I have local properties to see and ones in Oakhurst and Sonora which will require a bit of driving to accomplish.
Its been a challenge this week to cope with some depression. Friends have pointed out that illness can drag one down emotionally and I really can't remember a time when I was free of the hacking cough and its related side effects. I don't cope well with not being able to pay people on time for services and regular payments. When I stand back and look at the big picture I can see how far the Lord has brought me financially from a year ago, yet there is some distance to go yet to really be in full control.
After living the majority of your life with someone to talk to, plan with, listen to, enjoy everything together with and then overnight you are alone. Well there are changes that have to accounted for. For those of you that thought I would never make it without Nan, well there are many times when I think you are right but here I am over a year later, still kicking, making bread, making a living, pets are still cared for, grandchildren are adored and cared for at every opportunity. It seems like I now live my life sort of kicking and screaming about how much I really don't want to be alone yet I'm doing pretty much OK with it. I've got to say that the huge investment of time and organizing skills by Sylvia has helped more than one could ever know. I get to function in an organized world where everything is in its place and makes great sense. That is a huge boost.
So now I just want to urge you to relax in the love of the one you are with and have a blessed weekend.

love

tim

working 6:30 am to 10 pm

Dear Family and Friends,

Well this has been a get down and work day. Ken called this morning at 6:20 to inform me that due to falling rain our walk was cancelled. He told me to go back to bed. Instead of reclaiming the warm covers the dogs and I headed down to the desk and started writing appraisals. By noon 2 were already done and emailed out, by 4 2 more were completed. I'm now working on #5. I've not been this focused for the past year and of course with few phone calls to interrupt I was able to just immerse myself in the work. Frankly at this point it feels really good to make this kind of progress. During the day I've been hampered by bouts of coughing, chest pains and an Internet that quit for 30 minutes this afternoon.

this evening Nikki tempted me out to watch Keanna at tumbling and then we had dinner at La Villa. Now I'm back cranking again.

I am so thankful to find appraisal orders coming in, some with cod payment ordered as well.

On my favorite subject, Nan, I am discovering that as time passes the process changes somewhat, the process of remembering. I've recently signed up for the Christian singles Internet connection, wow has the box been full and as people have been writing in I can sort of learn a bit about them. They are all lovely people I'm sure but I sure don't see any Nan's in the mix. Perhaps it is like this for every person who has lost a precious long time spouse. You've become so used to and dedicated to that other person that anyone else seems to pale in comparison. I know I'm not supposed to compare, I'm supposed to just keep an open mind and let God lead and I'm fine with that, just saying when you live with a person like Nan who is so outstanding on so many levels including courage, appeal, genuine, loyal, fun it just make it very hard for anyone else to catch ones attention.

I'm remembering different things about Nan, about our travels, about her energy level and excitement for seeing new things, buying new things, creating a special moment no matter where we were, in the cabin along the inland passage in Alaska, trying to find a comfortable place in a terrible bed in Sydney Australia, making a shower work in London, eating bread in the middle of the night, wide awake due to jet lag laughing and trying to find a channel on TV in English, traveling across the country on a train with the two little ones in tow by herself. Driving a new car all the way to the middle of no where to a summer camp where Jason was working, never stopping to rest and then driving another car all the way back, by herself. Wow this family was blessed to have this lady, I was lucky to have her beside me no matter what.

So on hard days when little hope can be found we still have our rich memories to buoy us along.

Love to all

tim

Challenges

Dear Family and Friends,
Good evening or morning, I woke this morning knowing I was feeling better in the same manner I woke yesterday to know I was not feeling well. Ken and walked our route and then went our own ways to work. I had the high privilege of seeing one right here in Discovery Bay, a referral from a friend. Great house and another story of triumph over loss. 10 year ago the owner lost his beloved wife to cancer and eventually ended up marrying his high school sweetheart years later. The place was really nice, well situated on a deep water channel and I enjoyed the visit. Then it was off to Martinez to see another cute place. What I will remember is a very old collie who followed me everywhere just hoping for a sniff of my pant leg which of course has the scent of Starr and Lady, what a great old doggie. While shooting the last comp photo in Martinez I encountered a homeowner. We appraisers try to be sly, shoot our photo and get down the road but she caught me so I had to explain what I was doing, why and how it was important to her, well actually it was not important to her at all but she ended up thanking me for explaining what was going on.
After completion of my work in Martinez I set the computer for the comps in Livermore that I had run out of time yesterday to shoot when I was there. The trip to Livermore was uneventful other than to hear from an agent who let me know an appraisal I had completed for a beautiful home in the Oakland hills with a panoramic view of the bay had been cut $250,000. Wow, that was a blow and so I went through the normal process of asking for any information he had that i could respond to. I know from experience that doing a decent rebuttal to this review will require a trip back to Oakland and a visit to every sale he mentioned as alternates to those used in my report. It will take about a day to do the work and of course there is no further fee for this work so its like I'll be working for free for the day. One does not have a choice though for its a matter of professional pride to support ones work and to basically rip the review in pieces in a very kind and formal way. Problem is, the reviewer never even has seen the interior of the subject property and never will. These kind of things that are part of my work hit me personally very hard as I do try to do it right in the first place but in todays market place it is always easy for someone to drop a value and then look like a hero to the lender even though what they have done is pick the dregs of the sales available to make their case. Nan was a professional reviewer for years but was trained by an outstanding reviewer to avoid doing the slash and burn approach, rather to be a second set of eyes to see if the appraiser made his case or not. Something tells me this reviewer was only interested in bashing the value, it happens and thats why there is a rebuttal process.
Its been a cat and mouse game at the bank all week. When I'm paid with credit cards it often takes 2 or more days before the money becomes mine, is formally inserted into the account, meanwhile expenses continue pouring in, insurance payment here, data payment there, house payment just completed. I remember the good old days when we would go to the bank to make a deposit and the stack of checks would be an inch thick. Now I'm really lucky to have more than one check to deposit at a time. Well at least I still have a job of sorts, so many are just laid off right now and that is very very sad.
This evening I took in a new order. This nice family purchased a home but when it came time to close the loan the seller could never be located so eventually the deal died and the buyer was out expenses for title, appraisal, home inspection, termite. The order this evening was for a different home they have located and are buying. I could not see myself charging full fee again as these people had paid out so much already. So I gave them a discount, Nan would have said, you what!!! But somehow it just seemed like the thing to do and I have already captured the funds from their credit card so its far better than nothing.
And so goes life, one challenge to the next. To be honest there is little joy in living this way and that is where the little guys come in. To experience them is pure joy. They live in a safe world with loving parents, food to eat, a warm bed and loving arms to hold them. I treasure every chance I get to help with them. Its a very good trip.
So my friends, thanks for listening, I'm feeling some better and trying to do simple things like wear a coat outside, drink tons of water, eat carefully and think positive, yea right. OK I'll try!

love

tim

Ill again

Dear Family and Friends,

After nearly recovering from the last months of being sick this morning I had a total relapse. I woke knowing that I was ill, fever, constant coughing and draining nasal passages. Ken and I were set to walk so I went ahead. It was a tough go as I coughed my way around the lake in the cold air. I was so glad to be back home and to hit the shower. I stayed in the shower for some time and then met Ray as planned. Then we drove to Stockton where he suggested we go have a free breakfast at Denny's. Well the line of people waiting at the two places we went told us to forget that idea so we tried IHOP. It took some time to get served but the food was excellent. I had pancakes packed full of nuts and whole wheat, wow were they good. the Ray made a quick stop at CostCo and we drove to the motorhome repair place and I picked up the repaired motorhome. I drove directly home, did quick research and drove to Livermore for an appointment. Then after seeing the house I drove back to DB where Keanna was out of school. She was coughing and felt sick too so we just sort of rested and took it easy. She asked if we could go to the park so later in the afternoon we drove over to the park where we found some of her school friends playing, dogs being walked, moms talking and it was a great scene.
We drove home and then went to pick up Kallie from her sitters. I had them here at the house until about 6 when Nikki picked them up. They are really enjoyable girls and full of smiles. This afternoon I washed and cut up some strawberries for Keanna and she finished them plus had some apple juice. Trying to get those fruit and veges into her.
Now I'm ready to go to sleep. I've just watched the Mentalist, a show I really enjoy. I think the guy that plays the main lead is really outstanding and we used to watch him in others shows and he was good there too.
I intend to go up, run a bath and sit in the jetted tub for awhile hoping to break the hold this illness has on me. I just can't believe that I'm sick again.
So good friends and loyal family,

love to all

Tim

Back to work

Dear Family and Friends,

8:25 and in a few minutes I'm going to watch a movie I've been wanting to see. Lois and Ray invited me to go to town with them to grab a burrito. Afterwards they wanted to stop at Food Max and in the entrance there are two big red machines. They had a code which comes to them each monday through the internet and with that code they were able to rent two movies for free. Well I've wanted to see National Treasure 2 for some time and I have it in my hot little hands. Fun, fun.

This morning with Ken safely in a meeting in Brentwood I slept in but the dogs starting begging so we ended up at the park which they dearly loved. Then it was back to work on appraisal business the rest of the day. I'm trying to gradually get used to the idea to eat more often and just smaller amounts. So I have had some dried fruit and nuts a couple times, a griller for lunch with salad and cottage cheese, oatmeal for breakfast and strawberries and tonight a burrito with rice. How I would love to weight 150 pounds again but so far my desire to dump the pounds has not been stronger than my desire for pleasure, that is eating. I don't keep anything really bad in the house anymore but I still manage to eat too much of even good things, its a struggle but I'm not giving up.

I picked up a new order today for Livermore which I will see tomorrow at noon, then back to pick up Keanna at 2 from school. In the morning Ken and I will walk and then Ray is going to go with me to pick up the motorhome from the repair place as it is now fixed.

I'm anxious to get down to see Timothy before he grows any older without the guidance of his conservative pappa to keep him on the straight and narrow. Plus it is always a blast to visit with the young people who just happen to live by the Pacific Ocean.

While money remains tight it is at least coming in. I'm thankful for that. Good news came today from Bob and Carrol. Her tests showed that she will not have to have more chemo yet and its been two years. Great reasons for rejoicing. Also from Irene comes word that her most recent surgical procedure appears to have been a success. As I understand it the surgeons shut down several vessels which were supplying blood to one of her tumors and so far the results are great, no pain. Success is a very precious thing especially when battling with cancer. We will all take every victory we can have and treasure it.

So good night my friends,

love

tim

ps Jason and Jo gave me this wonderful photo of Timothy which Jo recently captured. I just love it.

Help me make it through the night.....

Well it is more interesting when you have two little people under your normally quiet roof, little people that are under the age of 6, that have energy to burn, ideas to try out, an enormous desire to play games.
I last wrote after Sylvia had finished her playful shift and gone home at around 9. Shortly thereafter Keanna went to bed after the ritual of story reading, starting the princess CD player with very quiet music, prayers and mandatory drinks of water and trips to the bathroom. She settled in a came down and wrote the blog. It was not long before she began to cough and it only grew worse. She came down and settled under a blanket on a couch nearby and I went up and started up the Lois given humidifier and gave Keanna some nose spray shots. At about 11 or so she went back to bed and fell asleep. I took went to bed with a trusty monitor nearby to let me know how Kallie was doing. The girls took turns coughing during the night and at 4:33 Kallie woke me with a start, she was playing quietly in her bed and making happy sounds. Nikki had given me careful instructions which I followed. First warm up the bottle by immersing it into a glass of hot water, when the bottle is room temperature they Kallie will drink it. Stumbling downstairs in my warm robe I found a partially completed bottle, warmed it guessing that it was enough. Then I quietly entered Kallie's room where she was quietly playing with her monkey and blanket. I kept the room light low, changed her and then took her to a recliner where she had the bottle straight down. Then still keeping it quiet and dim I put her back to bed and in a short time she was sleeping soundly again not to wake until 7:45. Keanna did not roll out until after 8 am.
Then the fun began as I warmed a bottle for Kallie and let her play in her exerciser with her little kido IPOD and pink blanket. I started Keanna's toast, warmed her sausage, peeled a banana, opened the pears and poured a glass of rice milk. Then while she was eating I held Kallie and she drank a bottle. When I tried to feed her she was having none of it. I took her back upstairs and discovered a seriously nasty diaper, I mean can we take a paint brush and paint the entire body, yikes. So while holding her by her feet and began to hose her down with baby wipes. Finally I began to see pink skin again and knew I was making progress. She just kept up her windmill arms the entire time and laughed and smiled, glad to get rid of the load, no kidding. Keanna came to see how it was going but left muttering something about a bad odor. One more bottle and Kallie was out for a nap and Keanna and I played games and then started on a 100 piece puzzle which we will complete on Tuesday when she comes to visit. Nikki arrived about 11:45 just as Kallie was waking and they had a happy reunion, Kallie was all smiles to see her mommy and Keanna had many things to tell her, about Sylvia repairing her bunny, about pictures created, movies watched, good food excellently prepared by chief pappa! Hyperbole perhaps.
And then it was quiet, really quiet, too quiet. I loaded the dishwasher, started a loaf of bread baking and had a mocha.
For anyone who has grandchildren the story I have just shared is nothing new and for those unfortunate ones who have kids unwilling to do their duty and give you grandchildren you won't totally get it yet. It is an experience like none other, you are constantly reminded of dim memories when your own were little yet these ones seem to move so much faster, take such terrible risks, talk back a bit and seem to stretch your abilities a bit more, could it just be age or are they really hooked up to the energizer bunny by invisible wires of power!
I love my three little kidos very much and during the night I had an epiphany. For some time I find myself fearful, in a way I never felt when I was younger. I sort of lived without fear, drove without fear, traveled and did sports without a lot of fear, yet last night as I would wake and hear little coughs or another noises, was I hearing gurgling? were they OK? were they at risk? checking on either would involve opening doors that enviably end up making noises and probably waking them. So I just laid there with my fears and suddenly I realized that I've changed over the years through what happened to Nan, hundreds of times I would wake and gently place my hand on her arm or body just to feel the movement of her breathing, or walk back into a hospital room quietly and touch her to see her breath, I was afraid I would discover that I had lost her while I slept or was away and after living with that constant fear of her dying for so long it became a way of life and last night I was struck by my fear of danger or the unknown even though every precaution had been taken, the house was warm, dry, locked up tight, beds were free of anything risky, precautions had been taken. Can you understand what I felt, perhaps yes, perhaps no depending on your own frame of reference and experiences. It was a wakeup call to me to move back from dreading the worst to living in the thrill of life and hope.
On another topic while some dumb game was going on I was engaged in the important work of creating the perfect loaf of bread and it worked. Filled with whole wheat flour and flax seed it tastes great. Yes I know one should not eat warm bread but one does need to know if the loaf turned out good or not, yes it did!
I've had a day without any serious coughing and if this holds perhaps I'll be able to join the guys in Modesto as they work on some numbers for churches in the area. We'll see.
I wish you a good week, one with hope in spite of this constant flow of bad news, some real and a lot just hype. We all just need to get back to basics, care for each other, spend a lot less and be grateful for what we have. Its a new era now and how it will turn out is not up to the government or the state, its up to us. We can do this and live through it.

love

tim