Dear Family and Friends,
This afternoon Keanna was munching down her little happy meal when something new took place, Kallie began to follow her nose and perked up with interest. Not that you feed anything from McDonald's to babies that are 4 months old, but she did notice the odor so Nikki caught the cue and this evening Kallie is trying her first food. Of course it is mostly milk and she seems to be spitting out most of it but its still a big day in our family life.
I've included a couple photos I took yesterday afternoon when Steve had me watching the girls for a few minutes. They were shot with my phone so they are not that clear but I think you can still see what I saw, two very beautiful little girls having fun, loving life.
This has been a very long day. Outside it was just perfect, the sun and weather were excellent but important files beckoned to me at my desk. So this morning I took stock and decided to deal with the relo first. Amazingly it has taken all day to complete. My computer is gradually growing slower and slower in its ability to access MLS data, photos and such. Then there is this problem with the kitchen being so nearby and having such a limited supply of anything decent to eat or drink. I've eaten up my entire tomato supply, raided the non fat cottage cheese, drank water, mocha, 16 ounces of water with a shot of lemon in it and some orange juice.
A couple nights ago I discovered some great tasting little sticks in a pettridge farm metal can, they tasted so good. Today I was talking to Sharon and she said she has some of them too but she went and spoiled it, she asked me to check the date when they expire, I was shocked to see they were to be eaten before July of 2004, yikes.
So I'm glad this bleak day is over, weekends without Nan are no fun at all. I was talking to God, sort of begging really, no personal emails were coming in and I just sort of wanted to talk to someone, in a minute or two the phone rang, it was Art calling from a catamaran on the ocean near Kihea, He and Connie were on a snorkeling outing, had been to one island and loved it and were on their way to yet another island for more. It was so good to hear his voice and to connect to someone so far away but so special. He was amazed that he could get a signal while out on the open seas and soon enough the signal died but what a nice moment. I've also talked to Sharon in Texas and Shawn in the hospital, Nikki and a couple of clients today. All I wanted to do was go play, for me that means cleaning a corner of the garage or the fish tank or hooking up the TV Steve and Nikki gave me, just something with a bit of fun connected.
This evening I heard a big noise at the door of the office and it was Loree. She was here fresh from the horse ranch with boxes of files that needed to come back to the office. It was great to see her, it was cute watching her work with her spurs still on. Now there is something you don't see every day, your personal assistant and book keeper wearing spurs! There is really no one else in the world like Loree and she always amazes me.
Well another week is here and I'm not ready. I still have several reports to complete on my desk. I'll be very glad when Jean, the magic report writer returns from her mission trip to Hawaii. She is a huge help to me.
This evening I've heard from Carol in N. Carolina. She and Roger are going for a day trip to Dollywood tomorrow. Like she says whenever she goes Nan comes to mind. Nan loved Dollywood and what is not to love, the music is great on several different stages, the craftsmen are at work creating art, cabinets, wagons, all kinds of beautiful things, quilts, baked goods and you can question them as they work about how and why. Water runs over and around the different buildings creating rivers and streams, trees and flowers grow naturally all around. It is a beautiful place to visit, nothing like it anywhere else really. How Nan would love to be there tomorrow but alas her journey on earth is ended.
A question arises for many facing the loss of a spouse after years of marriage, what is to become of me? Some people solve the question by running out and getting married quickly, for some that might be the right thing to do, not for me though. Others just sort of drop out of society and wither away, some move forward in denial while others seem to take stock and in spite of their feelings they go through motions of normalcy. Have you considered what you would do? I think I've taken just about every route at one time or another except for getting married. For me to consider moving forward I feel I need to have my financial feet on the ground firmly and my mind settled.
I enjoyed hearing from Laurie Dunston this weekend. What a courageous path she is on at the moment, pursuing a master degree all the way on the east coast. Got to respect that kind of zeal of knowledge.
Well my friends, I wish you well,
sending love to all
Tim
2 comments:
I recall many times asking "what is to become of me" and you do that when you lose a partner, in my case, of 23 years. Somehow you do go on and things change and you change. Life is ever evolving and moving. I chose to embrace life with open arms, and it isn't/wasn't easy, but I feel I have reinvented myself into someone I may not have otherwise been.
Hi Tim, glad to be getting caught up with you after a busy weekend with friends. I have heard the advice to widows/widowers of waiting at least one full year before making any major decisions on the question of "what is to become of me" or, as many ask, "now what?" In my opinion you are doing exactly right, hunker down a bit, get your financial issues straightened out, and then in a few more months revisit the question. Every one is different so be patient with yourself! Deborah
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